http://waysquared.blogspot.com/

11th Hour Blog Updates -- June Done!

2011-12-30T00:01:00.005-06:00

Well, I managed to get the blogs updated through June just before the year ends. :) Looking back at June, I realized it was a year since I went part-time, and I have never regretted my decision. I am eternally grateful that I have the opportunity to spend more time with my kids while also still make a dollar (it at least pays for day-care and taxes!) and have "grown-up time".

Happy kids = happy mom = happy kids

Girlfriends

Claire continues to amaze me by what she's learning. Take karate for example -- she's memorized creeds (phrases I have trouble remembering!), perfected forms, and shows amazing discipline and listening skills. I thought that three might be a little young to start something so structured, but she's definitely shown me how wrong I was and look forward to watching her continue to grow.

I really like seeing how other students mentor each other

Gavin's still a momma's boy, which is both a blessing and a curse. He's inquisitive, brave, and a great tagalong to all the activities the kids attend.

Patiently watching karate class

Zong officially moved to Dallas in June which is great! I know he's busy with his residency, but it's still nice to know he's nearby. Funny moment recently: I told him that if there's a zombie apocolypse, he should definitely join up with us to be safe because we could use a doctor in our group ... to which he replied, "plus I'm your brother". Oh, well, yeah, there's that. Of course we want you, Zong!

I feel pretty

Check out the kids blogs and the June album online!

ClaireDeLing.blogspot.com
GavinDeXiang.blogspot.com
June album

May Blogs Done!

2011-12-08T16:03:00.006-06:00

Here I am at the end of the year, and I'm finally getting around to finishing the May blog updates. As I shiver in the cold (yes, northerners, 40's is COLD), I look at all the spring pictures and look forward to the warmer weather again!

Some highlights in May ...

Mother's Day at The Fields.
A perfect day of beautiful weather with my beautiful family.

Claire's first dance recital. We were so proud of her!

Gavin got hand-foot-mouth,
but it wasn't enough to actually wean him

Co-hosted Nina's baby shower in NYC. Love you, Dopey!

Dwo's graduation from UT at Austin.
Good for you for following your dream.
Congrats, baby bro, and we look forward to your future successes!

Please check out the kids blogs and the various albums from May ... and look forward to the June updates soon(ish)!

April Blogs (Finally!) Done

2011-11-21T23:42:00.003-06:00

Yes, I realize it's been two months since I last worked on the blogs which means that I continue to fall farther behind. Here is where I finally admit that trying to maintain a separate blog for each kid was probably a little bit over-promising, but you gotta shoot for the stars, right?

Looking back, the highlight of April was probably the Easter weekend trip to Rough Creek Lodge in Glen Rose, TX. It was a rare vacation where I actually felt rested and ... vacationed? ... afterwards! The food was amazing, the service was impeccable, and the kids had a great time. We had such a great time, we've decided to make it an annual tradition -- friends welcome!

Other than that, we spent a lot of time outdoors enjoying the weather and continued to have fun.

All the details are in the kids blogs ... 9 postings total. Enjoy!

Claire's blog
Gavin's blog
April Photo Album
Easter in Glen Rose album

March Blogs DONE

2011-09-19T14:27:00.006-05:00

Yes, I realize it's already September and I'm just getting around to updating the kids' blogs in March ... so sue me (no, don't, I'm only working part-time and really like what money I actually make). As I looked through the March pics, a few things jumped out at me as my March highlights ...

We had an all-too-rare moms night out with the girls from Claire's playgroup. It was a going-away dinner for Cathy G who moved back to Colorado to be closer to family, and we also celebrated Tina's birthday.

Our family got to attend Sesame Street Live at the Ambit Energy suite in the Verizon Theatre. What a great company perk! James also took the kids to see Thomas a couple of months later.

The Pees/Parks had our annual Spring outing, and the Arboretum was beautiful as usual. It was extra-special this year with the dads attending as well.

Gavin got his first haircut and has had a few since. It shocks me how quickly the kids grow! We're still working on having him actually sit in the chair by himself ... it's getting better. Claire has become a pro, just calmly sitting in the seat without moving for the duration of her haircut.

Even though I was horribly sick on my birthday, it was still special one with both James' and my parents in town to celebrate quietly at home (just the way I like it!). Thirty-three has been just fine, though I admit that I almost corrected someone when they said I was 33 in June because I honestly thought I was still 32. I've got two kids; no time for aging!

The kids had their Spring school pics. They turned out ok. Claire's would have been great except that her headband was across her forehead, reminiscent of a 70's throwback, and Gavin was pouty and all scratched up. But they sure were cute! They ended up getting re-takes that I sat on the side and helped wrangle.

Check out the kids blogs to see what they've been up to!
Claire's Blog
Gavin's Blog
March Pics

I'm on a roll! Blogs to Feb

2011-07-26T15:33:00.003-05:00

February blog postings have also been posted! This time, I even managed to get a couple of videos included. Pretty cool, huh?

Reflecting back on February, the crazy snow week definitely stands out. I managed to stay at home with the kids for seven days straight without leaving the house, a feat previously incomprehensible, but actually not that bad in actuality. We did lots of the usual (arts and crafts, playrooms, baking) plus some extra to fill in the gaps (bounce houses, blanket forts, and snowball fights!).

A huge event was Claire turning three. She has grown up so much over the last year, and it's hard to face the fact that she's not my little baby anymore. She's talking in full sentences (paragraphs sometimes!), making tons of decisions on her own from what to wear and what she wants to eat, and teaching her baby brother everything she knows. At the same time, I feel like I am probably tougher on her because I think of her as so much older than Gavin ... and then I realize she's only three!

I can't wait to get the blogs up to date to July so that you can see what the kids have been up to the last four months since these Feb postings -- karate, dance recitals, swimming, family trips, and more!

January Blog Postings DONE

2011-07-24T00:59:00.004-05:00

FINALLY posted the January blog updates for the kids. I know, I know, it's now July, but what spare time I have doesn't seem to be devoted to sitting in front of a computer for recreational purposes.

That being said, I honestly love going through the pictures of the month and picking out a handful that I think others would like to see. Picking out the pictures themselves is an art. It's a blend of what's good photographically-speaking (composition, lighting, all that jazz), what does the best in capturing all the events of the past month, and what I think others would actualy be interested in looking through. As I pick out each picture, I have a silent monologue of the caption that would post right underneath the picture in the voice of each child because I've been told it's the captions that really express the moment.

It also gives me a few minutes to reflect on how much I love my family and am so proud of them. It makes me appreciate my friends and feel blessed at everything we have. It forces me to actually enjoy the moments that seem to pass all too quickly and to give each memory a moment of respect to acknowledge how it has helped to shape who I am today.

Plus, I get to re-smile at pictures like this:

This is me ... as soon through Claire's eyes and drawn by Claire's hand
01/17/2011

Don't forget you can check out pictures from January in our album online!

Match Day

2011-03-17T15:43:00.000-05:00

March 17th was a big day for our family -- must be the Irish in us. Joking. Actually, Thu, 3/17 was Match Day for all the med students across the country. It's a pretty complicated (and stressful!) process that all culminates in this one morning of announcments.

Our family spent the morning watching the presentations for the Wash U students online. Zong's school does an awesome job where they do a webcast of each student receiving their letter on stage and reading the results live in front of their friends and family. It was incredibly touching to see the excitement and joy on the faces of these students who have worked so hard and achieved so much.

I ended up watching it from beginning through the end even after Zong was done because I felt so honored to be a witness to these couples finding out that they're matched in the same city, families discovering where they'll be living for the next 4-8 years, and ... drum roll ... hearing that Zong is going to be spending some quality here in our very own Dallas! Zong matched for Plastic Surgery here at UT Southwestern which, incidentally, was his first choice in locations. So not only will he be close by, he's one smart cookie that his #1 wanted him, too!

So proud of you, Dr. Zong, and can't wait to have you here in Dallas! No pressure to hang out with us ever, but at least you know that you'll always have family nearby, a room to crash, meals to share, fridges to raid, and hugs ready to give.

P.S. If I'd known my dad was going to take a picture (well, duh, what was I thinking?!), I would have taken video of the annoucement instead!

The Merchant Prince (working title)

2011-03-16T12:38:00.004-05:00

Support my baby brother Dwo as he sets off to create a film of his very own!

Any monetary donations $250+ are tax-deductible through the University of Texas at Austin, but only by check. You can also donate with cc from his website, and every donation comes with a "thank you" item.

The Merchant Prince blog

Email Dwo (Huay-Bing Law) for more info

Thanks!

Way-Way

Bookstore Update

2011-02-24T16:31:00.007-06:00

Something I'm trying to catch up with is all of the photo books that are long overdue. Without furthur ado, I have three new books from 2010.

Visit My Bookstore

Cathy Baradell's Caring Bridge
I took Cathy's Caring Bridge site and made it into a book. I wanted to make sure I -- as well as her family and friends -- had physical access to her spirit and last days.

Catherine Anne Baradell | Make Your Own Book

June 2009 - Phoenix, AZ
Pictures from our Law Family trip to Phoenix, AZ. You can also read Claire's account on her blog. I made a small accident with this book and selected 12x12 inches instead of 7x7 inches. Imagine my surprise when I went to order it and discovered my mistake! I tried to change the size of the book, but, alas, I would have needed to start from scratch to move everything over to 7x7. Given that it was a good year after the trip that I got around to putting together the book, I figured I'd punt and just enjoy us in megasize!

June 2009 - Phoenix, AZ by the Law Family (and More!) | Make Your Own Book

San Antonio, TX - Sept 2010
One of our two Law Family trips last year. I went a new direction and took the text from the kids' blogs to be the text in the book; might as well take advantage of the fact that I actually wrote some stuff down (albeit months late!). Here's Claire's account as well as Gavin's blog, which I just updated a week or two ago. I have to admit, it certainly saved me time, plus I managed to sneak the book into the first tier of pages/price range. Woo-hoo! The only bummer was that I didn't ge any pictures with the whole family this time around. Hopefully we did a better job at our second 2010 Law Family Trip (the pictures for which I haven't even looked at yet).

San Antonio - Sept 2010 by the Law Family (and More!) | Make Your Own Book

Happy shopping!

Welcome back!

2011-02-24T16:26:00.002-06:00

Okay, so it's been awhile since I posted. In fact, I just published three entries (June, July, and October 2010) that I started and never finished. I'll also go ahead and admit that I didn't re-read or proofread them just now before I published them, but at least they're out there. I'm going to try and post more often, especially those funny little stories that I'm constantly telling about the kids. I'm not out for a Pulitzer; just looknig for a way to record the highlights of life.

So, come back often, dear friend.

It Does Get Easier

2010-10-11T12:21:00.005-05:00

For some, going from being DINKs (dual-income, no kids) to having a child is mind-altering, life-changing, sleep-depriving, patience-testing, hardest thing they'll ever do. It was for me ... until I had a second kid, and I realized having the one was easy! Sure, I'm more relaxed in taking care of Gavin's needs, but the challenges of juggling two -- two schedules, two tempers, two naptimes, two meal plans -- has challenged me to multi-task like never before ... and I still can't seem to remember my own antibiotics because my brain is apparently full.

But it does get easier. I tell that to my other girlfriends that just had their #2 (and myself!) all the time ... and some days I actually believe it. The trick, though, is being able to answer when asked (and you WILL be asked), "when?! WHEN does it get easier?!"

Take last Friday, for instance. I managed to get a load of laundry, a load of dishes, and a loaf of banana bread going all before going to playgroup in the morning. Of course, I was 30 minutes late to playgroup (which is really "on time" nowadays), the load of laundry is still sitting unfolded in a pile on the couch, the dishes were just the first of about three loads I needed to do to clear out the sinks, and the bread ... well, I'll take credit for the bread. :)

It has gotten more manageable incrementally over time. I first acknowledged it about the time that Gavin learned to fight back a little bit more and I didn't worry every minute about him being mortally wounded by Claire. She would lay on him on the ground, and he would complain and push her back. When he started sitting up, I could put him on the ground to play with her, and she would roll a ball back and forth. Crawling brought on more freedom (and headaches) as he could now follow both of us around the house as we did tasks, and pulling up has been a whole new set of adventures.

The moments that make it totally worth it are when I catch them rolling on the ground together laughing or just quietly playing together. It's only with Claire that Gavin really lets go the chuckles, and it's her he looks for first in the morning when he wakes up. Usually I try to wedge myself between them so they don't disturb each other, but he'll pop up and try to climb over me first thing to go for her. And Claire will go out of her way to make sure Gavin is happy. When he tries to flip over when I change him, Claire will dance for him to distract him. When he's done being in his high chair during breakfast but I'm doing the dishes, she'll sing songs and blow bubbles for him to buy me just a few more minutes. When he's crying in his car seat, she'll try to console him, "Don't worry, Gavin. We're almost there!" just like we did for her when she was little. Claire will protect Gavin and make sure he's okay because, as she says, "that's Gavin; he's my bru-dder".

Sure I still worry about the poking, crushing, tipping, etc, etc, etc that goes on, but as long as they're relatively safe, I'll take it for all the hugging, kissing, and loving they show towards one another. That's what family is all about.

Potty Training - Update

2010-08-14T21:39:00.001-05:00

Claire's still doing an awesome job with the panties. Just thought I'd share a funny story or two ...

Accident-wise, we've had very few. There was an incident one night where I could hear Claire saying, "Daddy, I have to pee-pee. Daddy, I have to pee-pee. Daddy, I have to pee-pee." but since I was putting Gavin down for the night, I didn't want to start screaming, "James! She has to pee-pee!" James was on the phone and didn't hear her, so the next thing I heard was, "Daddy, I had an accident." Whoops. :D

Also, we've gotten pretty used to using toilet paper off the floor. That is, TP that Claire has unraveled from the tube while she's sitting on the potty. Usually full rolls, of course. I'll post pictures of that soon.

Well, Claire decided one evening to try and flush the ENTIRE wad of paper down the toilet at once. She just picked up the mountain of paper and stuffed it into the potty. Luckily I caught it early and fished it all out with a platic bag. Even though she's mastered doing the whole potty process all by herself, you still need to keep an eye on her!

Potty Trained!

2010-08-13T22:30:00.002-05:00

Claire just came home from school today after wearing panties all day! Before you give me any accolades, I really have to give the credit to my parents.

Over the last 6 months or so, Claire has been using the potty sporadically. She would go when we thought of it or as a game. She'd sit on the potty when she woke up or was about to take a bath. I'll be honest, it just seemed like a lot of hassle. I mean, with diapers, you go when you wan to go, I'll change you when I want to change you! Maybe in a week, she would use the potty 4-5 times on the weekend and do pretty good at school. She would tell us when she needed to go, but a lot of the times she was just having too much fun to stop!

What put us over the edge was the trip to Houston. We went Thu, 7/29-Tue, 8/3, and during the few days we were there, my parents pretty much said, "hey, we have wood floors; she doesn't need diapers!", so she didn't. Just a few accidents, but she did great!

So today, Claire decided she wanted to wear panties to school. She had gone without a diaper at home pretty much all weekend, but sending her off was ... well, honestly, the teachers' problem once she got there. :D And, guess what? She came home dry! Yay, Claire!

Cause, Effect, and the Fear Factor

2010-07-15T10:23:00.004-05:00

We've been working on teaching Claire cause and effect for awhile now. If you do this then you'll get this. When you (yadda yadda) then (something something).

I also find myself taking it to a new level by introducing hyperbole. More than just "If ... Then", it's become "If ... Then ... AND"! So "If you eat that rubber band, then you might choke" becomes "and we'll have to cut it out with scissors". Or "If you don't brush your teetch, then your teeth might turn brown" ... "and ants might come eat your teeth while you sleep at night!". Okay, okay, not exactly parent of the year material, but it gets her to do it!

I have not, however, introduced her to the fear of monsters and the dark, but it seems as though she's discovering the potential there all by herself. The other day, she said she was afraid of the monster in the dark, and I asked her who taught her about monsters in the dark (after telling her that we scared away any monsters that might be there) and she said, "Franklin". Yes, Franklin the turtle ... the one that's afraid of the dark but learned that he could take a flashlight into his dark shell so that he's not as afraid. Yeah, thanks, Franklin.

Spontaneous!

2010-07-06T12:55:00.005-05:00

We did something pretty wild and kooky this weekend ... we went down to Austin. Well, okay, that wasn't the wild and kooky thing. What made it so crazy is that we did it so spontaneously. As in no planning. As in "hmm, we're leaving Evan's birthday party; want to go do now? Go to Austin? Sure!". Seriously.

All we had with us was a diaper bag (with three clean diapers apiece, thank goodness), Gavin's lunch, and ... well, I guess that's really it. We were already over in Watauga, so we simply jumped on 377, 820, and found ourselves on I-35W headed to Austin.

Claire was pooped from the party and immediately fell asleep. Gavin wasn't too happy the first few miles, but we stopped at a Starbucks parking lot to feed and change him, then I squished myself into the back between the kiddos and fed him his jar food before practically draping myself over him in the car seat to put him to sleep. Blissful silence. And even though both kids woke up before we made it to Austin, we didn't have to make any stops before getting to the Pees'!

Luckily, both the Pees (George, Christina, and James) and the Law/Lius (Dwo, Crystal, and Kirby) were in town and free to hang out.

Of course, not having actually packed anything, we needed to get our victuals once we got to Austin. After Claire and James played for a little while, we headed out for a group trip to Target. James and I were very pleasantly surprised with the very reasonable prices for clothing, although, $350 later, we wondered how in the world we spent so much! It wasn't just 2 days worth of clothes though: diapers, jar food, sippy cup, cereal, pjs, phone charger, phone cover (mine broke on the way down), makeup, toiletries ... just think about everything you normally pack for a weekend away and imagine having to buy it all.

I won't bother going into the details of the actual trip; I'll let the kids tell that part. :) I just wanted to make sure I made note of the pretty cool thing that we did.

Claire's account

Gavin' account

Officially Part-Timer

2010-07-01T12:17:00.001-05:00

Well, as of today, I am officially a part-timer. No, not a short-timer (keep breathing, James!), but I won't be working a full 5-day / 40-hour work week anymore.

This is probably expected news to a lot of folks given my last blog posting before I went back to work. I actually approached Jeff back at the end of April, one month after I got back to work. In that month, I realized that I do still like my job, I do still like having some spending money, and the kids -- at least Claire -- do enjoy going to school. Just not 5 days a week worth. I felt as though my weekends were just a preparation to go back to work and that my already scarce time to spend with Claire had effectively been cut in half in order to also spend time with Gavin.

I think Claire feels it too; ever since I got back to work, she's been a lot more clingy and needing of my attention. I don't know if it's her (st)age, the fact that she's realizing Gavin's not going anywhere, or just the fact that I spend a lot less time with her now that I did before Gavin was born or while I was out on maternity. Maybe if I'm with her more, she'll be tired of me and want to be with Daddy again more.

I worked out my proposal -- 3 days a week with 2 in the office and 1 from home -- and presented it to Jeff who worked with HR to make it happen. As of yesterday, I am no longer a "regular employee" of Horizon Lines and am serving in a consultant/contractor role. My contract is through next year with the option to extend if this arrangement turns out to be beneficial to both sides.

I feel very blessed to have a husband and a boss that both support my decision. I know there is some trepidition from everyone involved, but the best thing we can do is try. And if it doesn't work out? Well, we'll cross that bridge if we come to it.

So look for me and the kids as we traverse the great city of Dallas (and beyond!). I can't wait to get into our next set of adventures ... and to start updating our blogs again!

P.S. No, I did not bill the time it took to write this. ;)

Letter from a CEO

2010-06-30T22:32:00.000-05:00

Now THIS is a letter from a CEO (regarding Woot being bought by Amazon) -- congrats to Woot, btw. Interesting how culture is such a strong driving force within an organization … and how it really does come from the top. Plus, it made me laugh.

Amazon, Woot, and You: But Mostly Woot
News by Woot! on June 30, 2010 at 3:30 PM

To be uncharacteristically serious for half a nanosecond, yes, Woot has signed an agreement to be acquired by Amazon. It shouldn't change anything much for us or you after the deal closes, we just figured you’d like to know a few details. You see, when two companies meet over drinks and some light jazz and decide they'd like to get to know each other better… You know what? Our CEO said it best in his letter to us employees...

Date: Weds, 30 June 2010
From: Matt Rutledge (CEO – Woot.com)
To: All Woot Employees
Subject: Woot and Amazon

I know I say this every time I find a picture of an adorable kitten, but please set aside 20 minutes to carefully read this entire email. Today is a big day in Woot history. This morning, I woke up to find Jeff Bezos the Mighty had seized our magic sword. Using the Arthurian model as a corporate structure was something our CFO had warned against from the very beginning, but now that’s water under the bridge. What is important is that our company is on the verge of becoming a part of the Amazon.com dynasty. And our plans for Grail.Woot are on indefinite hold.

Over the next few days, you will probably read headlines that say “Matt Rutledge revealed to be monstrous pseudo-human creation of Jeff Bezos.” You might even see this photo making the rounds. Rest assured that these rumors have nothing to do with our final decision. We think now is the right time to join with Amazon because, quite simply, every company that becomes a subsidiary gets two free downloads until the end of July, and we very much need that new thing with Trent Reznor’s wife on our iPods.

Other than that, we plan to continue to run Woot the way we have always run Woot – with a wall of ideas and a dartboard. From a practical point of view, it will be as if we are simply adding one person to the organizational hierarchy, except that one person will just happen to be a billion-dollar company that could buy and sell each and every one of you like you were office furniture. Nevertheless, don’t worry that our culture will suddenly take a leap forward and become cutting-edge. We’re still going to be the same old bottom-feeders our customers and readers have come to know and love, and each and every one of their pre-written insult macros will still be just as valid in a week, two weeks, or even next year. For Woot, our vision remains the same: somehow earning a living on snarky commentary and junk.

We are excited about doing this for all sorts of reasons. One, our business model is so vague that there’s no way Amazon can possibly change what it is we’re truly doing: preparing the way for the rise of the Lava Men in 2012. Also, our deal means that Jason Toon will finally be released from that Mexican jail owned by Zappos honcho Tony Hsieh. No, don’t lie, Tony, we’ve seen the paperwork. And we need a powerful ally in case Steve Jobs finally breaks down and comes after us for all our Apple jokes over the years. Don’t think of it as a buyout; think of it as NATO!

I will go through each of the above points in more detail later, but first, let me get to the top 5 burning questions that I’m guessing many of you will have.

TOP 5 BURNING QUESTIONS:

Q: F1RST!!!!
A: Okay, that’s not a question, but it is a good place to mention that our forums will still be policed by a team of moderators, as before. And also, Woot’s previous and always-in-effect privacy policy will still be just as always-in-effect, so don’t worry, there are no plans to suddenly give up or merge your forum data.

Q: Is Snapster leaving?
A: Are you kidding? He’s out the door about ten seconds after that check clea- that is to say, Snapster will continue as Woot.com CEO, just like before, and the rest of our staff’s not going anywhere either. Woot and all our various sites will continue to be an independently operated company full of horrible, useless products and an untalented jerkface writing staff, same as it ever was.

Q: Will the Woot culture change?
A: Amazon is interested in us because they recognize the value of our people, our brand, and our unique style of deep-tissue, toxin-releasing massage. And they don't want to start changing things now. Amazon's hoping our nutty Woot steez continues to grow and develop (and perhaps even rubs off on them a little). They’re not looking to have their folks come in and run Woot unless we ask them to, which incidentally you can do by turning off the bathroom lights and saying the word “Kindle” three times; a helpful Amazon employee will appear in the mirror. That said, Amazon clearly knows what they're doing in a lot of areas, so we’re geeked about the opportunities to tap into that knowledge and those resources, especially on the technology side. This is about making the Woot brand, culture, and business even stronger than it is today, and we expect that any changes will be for the better or we wouldn't bother with this endless paperwork.

Q: Where can I get one of those vuvuzelas?
A: Are you even paying attention?

Several months ago, when we were all sitting on Jeff Bezos’s bumper drinking orange Mad Dog and trying not to be noticed, we heard a voice in the distance yelling “You kids better not scratch my Mercedes or I’m calling the cops!” We ran. It was later that night when Amazon came by the house and said they liked our style and also wanted to get that money we owed them for messing up the chrome. We like to think that our relationship with Amazon will continue at this level for many, many, many years to come.

But we here at Woot are still a thoughtful company, so, at the end of the day, I watched the sunset, and its golden-hued glory made me think about two questions:

1) Is there really a universal deity?

2) Does such a thing preclude free will or are we humans in control of our own destiny?

After spending a lot of time falling asleep at the library while facing the philosophy books, I determined that the concept of destiny is a construct that allows man a gentle release from facing the terror of his existence, and that a Hyundai full of twenties would pretty much offer the same benefits. And so, I ultimately said YES!

This is definitely an emotional day for me. The feelings I’m experiencing are similar to what I felt in college on graduation day: excitement about getting a check from my folks combined with nausea from a hellacious bender the night before. I remember fondly that time when an RA turned on the lights and yelled “WHO OWNS THESE PANTS?” Except this time, the pants are a company, and the RA is you, and the sixty five hours of community service is a deal that will ensure the Woot.com experience can continue to grow for years and years and years, like a black mold behind the Gold Box. Join us, because together, we can rule the galaxy as father and son. Also, there will be six muffins waiting in the company break room, courtesy of the nice folks at Amazon.com. Welcome to the family!

Matt Rutledge
CEO, Woot

Direct press/media inquiries to media@woot.com.

http://www.woot.com/Blog/ViewEntry.aspx?Id=13390

Reward: Missing Baby

2010-06-28T22:24:00.003-05:00

Short story: I lost Claire at the mall. The longer story is that Claire is not really a runner and does a good job staying close to me ... except when she's with Kaylie. With Kaylie, she becomes this shrieking mass of excited fun.

What happened was we walked in the Gap at Stonebriar Mall which is more of a mega-Gap of 4 stores combined: Gap, Gap Body, Gap Kids, and Baby Gap. Claire and Kaylie ran to the back of the store, and I figured she'd just be trapped there and I would make my way to her.

Instead, I discovered that the Gaps were all connected by dressing rooms. One loooooong hallway that connected all of the Gaps together meaning Claire ran into the dressing room area and out .. well, one of the other three. Yikes.

Corrie and I called for Claire (trying not to freak out), and I let a store employee know that my daughter had run away. This is where I became incredibly impressed by the Gap staff. She immediately got on her headset and said something about "missing child". From the place I was at, I saw employees from each of the Gap stores immediately head to the front entrances of each store to make sure nobody left any of the establishments until we got it resolved.

While this was happening, Corrie found Claire who was hiding near the back of one of the stores (and not the one that we started in). She didn't respond to our calls because she had been pooping in her diaper. In fact, she had been looking for a bathroom because of the potty-training we'd been attempting.

I have to say ... whew! What a scary moment. Huge kudos to everyone at Gap for acting so quickly and proactively!

"Reel" Cool

2010-05-12T14:42:00.005-05:00

I'm constantly bragging about my little brothers to anyone who will listen for various things -- Zong's crazy smart, a med student at Wash U, and working for the CDC; Dwo's incredibly talented behind the camera ... apparently ALL cameras. :) They're also a testament to doing what you love and not settling for less.

Well, now you can see proof of Dwo's greatness (honestly, you probably don't want to see Zong's greatness because it will mean you have an infectious disease or are some kind of sick). If you get a chance, check out Dwo's reel! I got goosebumps when I saw it knowing that my baby brother actually created something that's a real movie!

Oh, and since I posted the other picture of Dwo being caught in the background, here's another one from a recent Austin American Statesman. You should actually watch the video that I stole this screenshot from and read the whole article, but here's a pic:

"Go back, go back, go back ..."

2010-03-21T23:18:00.013-05:00

"... Go back to where you were."

I was singing this song to myself the other day and asked James what song it was from. He said, "um, Blues Clues." Sigh, now I actually hum kid show songs to myself. Better than than, "there's a party in my tummy! so yummy, so yummy!" ... which has also happened before, and it's not pretty, I tell you.

Well, tomorrow I go back, go back, go back ... to work. I can hardly believe it's been 12 weeks already since Gavin was born on Christmas day. I had a little "moment" today while I was cleaning out the closet. Poor James walked in on me while I was wallowing, and I'm sure immediately regretted it. If I were him, I would have been looking for the nearest exit to get away as quickly as possible without being noticed. It was just a little overwhelming that, all on the same day, Gavin outgrew his 0-3 month clothes, I packed up my maternity clothes with the realization that I'm probably not having any more kids, I found I still don't fit in all of my pre-maternity clothes and have nothing to wear to work, and I have to go back to work with the guilt that I'm not home with my babies.

This time around, though, I'm definitely more laid back about leaving Gavin with my in-laws (and my parents in a couple of weeks). I left one scratch page of notes (ie "eats every 3-4 hours; here are my phone numbers; don't forget tummy time!"), and that's about it. In fact, I feel a little bit guilty because we haven't bothered acclimating Gavin to the bottle or anything yet, so tomorrow should be pretty interesting.

Three months home, three months back ... that's what I'm shooting for. I'm determined not to make a wholly emotional decision and to evaluate my situation again in three months. Deciding whether to stay at home full-time is a BIG decision, and it's not one I think I'm ready to make today. So, if you work with me, don't go telling my boss that I'm quitting or start scheming to steal my stapler yet!

One Last "Vacation"

2010-03-16T14:34:00.019-05:00

"Vacation" in quotes because I'm not sure traveling with two kids by myself can really be called a vacation, but I certainly gave it a shot!

I wanted to take advantage of the fact that I'm not currently working full-time during maternity leave by going down to Houston. It's not often that I can just pop on down to the city that I grew up during the week without burning precious vacation days, so why not make the trip the final days before I return to the office? I also thought it would be a good opportunity to give James a well-deserved break, let the grandparents see the kids without having to make the trek upstate, and get some all-too-seldom friend time in while I was there.

After debating transportation modes, I finally decided to take SWA down and risk the one-hour flight versus a five-and-a-half hour drive (shudder). I mean, how hard can it be, right? James looked at me like I was crazy, probably secretly glad that he wasn't going with us.

Let's go! We're ready!

Thursday
Figuring that I would be parking at the airport, I managed to get all three of our gear packed in one suitcase, one diaper bag, and one small backpack for Claire, plus Gavin's carrier for the car and a list of things that I would purchase once I got down to Houston (ie diapers, baby wash, etc). Luckily James volunteered to drop us off and pick us up, but the compact packing did help once I got to the airport and lugged everything inside to the ticket counter to get Gavin added as my non-rev lap passenger (which, if you ever need to do, I highly recommend getting to the airport way early because that line can be quite a beating).

I dressed Claire in the brightest shirt I could find in her closet and hoped that she didn't get away from me because it was unlikely I'd be able to run after her. Just in case, I tucked a business card with my cell phone and some other pertinent information into her backpack; lotta good that would have done since I ended up carrying the thing for her the entire time anyways. :P

My plan for flying with Claire has always been simple: keep her busy the first thirty minutes with food and then distract her the rest of the time with stickers, markers, and anything else I can get my hands on. If the flight is longer, try to arrange it during naptime, too. After getting through security (Gavin in the Ergo and Claire doing a great job taking off her shoes and walking through by herself), we got our McD's and ... our flight was delayed by an hour, which was so going to throw everything off. Claire ate her nuggets and played while Gavin slept, and I watched the clock knowing that this was a ticking time bomb.

What was supposed to be a plane activity ended up being a
waiting at the airport activity

Finally it was time to board. We got in our spot, and just as they were about to start, Claire announced she had to "poo-poo potty, Mommy!". I debated making her hold it but didn't want to set her back by weeks, plus everyone around us assured me that they wouldn't start boarding for AT LEAST 15 more minutes. We ran back to bathroom so she could do her thing, but when we got back to the gate, group A had finished boarding, and they were getting ready for pre-/family-boarding. I tried to show the attendant that I was part of group A, but he just threw a glance my way and huffed that family boarding hadn't started yet and I could just wait over there. Oh, and that I need to be prepared to hold Gavin in my lap the entire time because the flight was completely full. Okay, okay! Hmph.

When I did get on the plane, the attendant at the front said that there was a group that had held seats for me -- the people who were in line with me earlier that urged me to take Claire to the bathroom. How nice! Being surrounded by such thoughtful people definitely came in handy when Gavin started fussing and I needed to get his bottle. The gentleman next to me (grandfather of five) took Gavin without any hesitation and held him for the remainder of the flight which gave me time to hang out with Claire and breathe. Thanks! Claire was a doll, although I do recommend when traveling with a child (or two) to get rid of as much trash in advance as possible. Unpackage those crayons, take out the stickers from their individual envelopes, etc, because you'll just end up having to do it on the plane and being surrounded by a bunch of trash.

Stickers and crayons; a toddlers heaven

All done sleeping

Mom and Dad were waiting at the exit for us, and Claire ran right up happy to see them. After we got back to my parents', we hung out in the backyard -- we had AMAZING weather all weekend -- and then I got a real treat: a long nap!

One of the things I was most worried about traveling with the kids by myself (yes, I was worried, I just didn't voice it out loud lest anyone try to convince me not to do it) was nighttime. Bedtime in our household is a bit insane, and I was curious to see what would happen trying to put the kids down by myself. Luckily, my parents helped give Claire a bath while I got Gavin down, then I put Claire down during the window before Gavin woke up again. The three of us snuggled in bed together the rest of the night (and weekend, really).

Friday
Friday morning we enjoyed the gorgeous weather in the backyard. We were really lucky on this trip; it was hot and sticky the day we showed up but then was gorgeous until the morning that we left Yay!

Sunny!

Later, we went to Kemah with Claire sporting actual braids for the first time (got the idea from Jill's blog) for lunch and to play. We ate yummy food at Landry's and hit the rides on the Boardwalk. When the attendant asked Claire's age, I said "almost two" without thinking (free for kids under 2), to which Claire immediately corrected, "Mommy, I two. I two, Mommy!". Whoops. The attendant laughed and still let her in for free. Claire played so hard she fell asleep before we even made it to the stringrays and climbing area!

Kemah Boardwalk

Dad folding himself into the ride.

Gavin's first ride on a carousel

Choo-choo

Friday night I got another treat: dinner out with friends. I met up with Debbie, Syndee, Chi, and Mike for yummy crawfish and good conversation. It was also the longest I'd been away from both kids at once (3 1/2 hours) since Gavin was born as well as the first night I didn't have to put the kids down. After one tearful phone call from Claire ("Mommy, I miss you! Come home, Mommy!"), I headed home to help with the mess. As we were on our way home from dinner, my parents called to say Claire had fallen asleep in the car as my dad drove her around to look for me and to take my time. I still thought it would be a good idea to go home, and good thing because as I came in, Gavin was giving them a hard time. After they passed him over, he immediatly stopped crying which was pretty funny to all of us, so we took turns passing him around between us again to watch the cry-stop-cry-stop-cry phenomena. I guess the boy knows his momma. :) My mom was traumatized enough that she's not exactly jumping at the chance to watch the kids at night again anytime soon. Sorry!

Saturday
On Saturday morning we went to the park in the neighborhood until James' parents arrived from North Houston. Then Zong arrived, so Claire was in heaven. It really amazes me how good he is with her. I got some visitors -- EmJay, her mom, and Mary Mac -- so there was much conversating that afternoon for me, and then Crystal and Kirby came over that night, so Claire was over the moon happy.

I always appreciate an extra set of hands

Passed out from playing

Just throwing this in 'cause he's so darn cute

That night, bedtime was interesting. It involved me feeding Gavin while extending my arms for Claire to hug. She's such an awesome little girl and didn't mind at all, but it did make me wonder if I should consider going home early. Could I handle two more night of this? Too much to do still!

Sunday
Sunday was playdate day. The whole group headed to Sugar Land to Stomping Grounds which is essentially a coffee house with a playarea, kind of like the Wiggles or, well, McD's. We met up with Syndee + Charlie and Diana + David + Jacob who were down from Dallas. The kids (and Zong) had a blast, and Zong quickly became the favorite of the kids (no surprises there). I had an awesome time crawling around, but could have lived without the crazy fast slide, though. Ouch!

The kiddos sitting as they were asked to do

Short-lived, of course

After playing -- and Claire was POOPED! -- we went to Yummy Restaurant (really, that's the name) in Bellaire for yummy Chinese food before heading home where we got another wonderful visitor: Dwo was home! The Law kids were all home in Clear Lake for the first time since Christmas 2006.

That afternoon, Dwo and Crystal took Claire for another first: flying a kite. Amazingly, she knew exactly what to do. How, I'm not sure, but she was off and running as soon as she got her fingers on that string. James can't wait to try it with the big Tinkerbell kite he got her recently. You can tell that Dwo took these next pictures; when you've got it, you've got it, and he's got it (the eye, I mean)

Running

Uh-oh

Ready to go again

By the way, Sunday was also the time change when we all sprung forward. The kids handled it great and didn't miss a beat. I'm not sure they even noticed, and since I'm living a child-driven household right now, I didn't miss a beat (or that hour of sleep) either.

Monday
Monday morning I was supposed to meet up with Jenny and her boys but wanted to spend more time with my family since Dwo needed to head back to Austin before noon. We celebrated my birthday with cake and bummed around.

Happy birthday to me!

I wonder if the kid or the dog will fall in first

I spend forever trying to put Claire down for a nap, and by the time I did get her down, I found a surprise waiting for me: Jenny, Wade, Alex, Christy, and Tara were all there! We got to hang out for a little while before they had to leave. I'm so glad I got to see my Chum. Claire got a wonderful gift from the boys that she proudly wore the rest of the afternoon, even on our walk around the block.

My Chum-Chum

Bedtime this last night was awful. Claire didn't want to go down, and Gavin had a rare inconsolable fit. Nothing I was doing could calm his overtired butt down, so finally I gave up and handed him over to my dad. Both my parents thought there was no way it would work, but Dad tamed the beast! I know that made him feel good (especially after Friday night), and made me feel great. Plus, I got to put Claire down which I have to admit I miss sometimes now that James mostly handles it.

Tuesday
How quickly the visit passed! Tuesday morning we just packed and got ready to head back to Dallas. The only weird thing at the airport on the way back was security. Gavin has his Longhorn Wubbanub that seems to get a lot of comments (hook 'em!). I had gotten a couple of jabs -- mostly regarding the bball standings -- and the security guy as we were walking through said real low, "I'm not sure I can let that through." Thinking he was joking, I smiled at him and then realized he was serious! Then he added, "you're going to need to send that through the scanner". Seriously?! So I had to back out, put it in the round container, push it through, coax Claire back through the metal detector again which went off this time since she touched it on her way through, have her come back and then go through again without touching the sides, and then go through myself with Gavin strapped to me. Geez.

Ready to go home

The plane ride home was easy. The flight wasn't too full so we had a whole row to ourselves, Claire ate her subway -- sans bread, of course --, and Gavin slept. We hit some pretty bad turbulance which really scared Claire, and then a scenario happened that I had never considered when booking the flight: Claire fell asleep. The plane lands, and I'm looking around me: one diaper bag, one backback, one baby in carrier, and a sleeping toddler. Um, okay.

THIS I did not plan for

Luckily the guy in the row in front of me saw me predicament (or dismay) and offered to carry the bags. I took him up on it -- I'm not stupid -- and hoisted a sleeping Claire onto my hip. As we walked through the terminal, Claire woke up and exclaimed, "shopping!", so I relieved my second angel of my bags and did a little terminal shopping with Claire.

James was at baggage claim to meet us, and Claire was happy to see her daddy ... I was too. I feel great that I was able to take the kids out of town with me by myself, but I love knowing that it's even better when he's there beside me.

Welcome Home
When we got home, I found that none of my "honey-do" items got done, but James had a special surprise for me that made up for it: he had cleaned our bedroom and bathroom top to bottom and gotten new bed and bath linens that define the word "luxurious". Mmmmm ..... thanks, honey!

And that was that. I'm so glad I got a chance to take the kiddos to Houston and that the grandparents could see their babies without having to make the 5+ hour drive themselves. I hope to be able to do it more often, though I might push harder to get James to make that flight with me next time. :)

I'm still going through the 900+ pictures that my dad took (seriously), so the ones on this posting are from my camera. Check back to link to the Houston trip album!

Kids Say the Darndest Things

2010-03-06T20:56:00.000-06:00

Claire's always had a pretty good vocabulary, but now she's really putting together sentences and expressing what she's thinking and feeling. Some stories:

"For ..."
I've been working on Claire to say she's sorry when she's done something wrong, but I'm trying to take it one step further and to say WHY she's sorry (ie "sorry for kicking Gavin in the head on accident", "sorry for throwing my food across the room", "sorry for smushing play-doh into the carpet" are all recent examples). She may not be able to enunciate the words fully or even really finish the sentence, but I think she's getting it. Well, the other day after doing the latest impish thing, Claire immediately said, "Sorry". Wanting her to understand why, I prompted her, "For ...?", and she looked at me solemnly and said "Five .....?".

"MY-dea"
One of the things we do at home is let Claire choose the next activity. I think she was learning about "ideas" at school because she kept exclaiming "I-dea!" before starting the next thing one morning. I asked her if Mommy could come up with an idea, and she said, "No! MY-dea!" (we're also going through a case of mine-itus)

"I happy now"
The terrible twos -- which I have recently learned is the terrible two YEARS, not the terrible two years OLD; apparently three is worse than two?! mon dieu -- has brought the onset of Claire's wild temper. She will throw a fit if you don't know what she's trying to say, she will throw a fit if she doesn't get what she wants right away, she will throw a fit if the sky is clear, the wind is blowing, or the day of the week ends in "y". A trick that our friends use with their daughter is the "whiny spot". Similar to the "naughty spot" (ie thinking time), if their daughter needs to whine, she can go to her whiny spot until she's ready to join them again that way no feelings are supressed or repressed. I used something similar with Claire where, when she was throwing a fit while we were playing, I asked her to remove herself from the situation and work out her anger, and then she could come back to play. To my surprise, she did just that. She stomped from the living room to the kitchen, stomped in place a few times and yelled nonsense, took a deep breath, and then came back to declare, "I happy now" before resuming playing. Wow! The only bittersweet part of this story is that every so often, Claire will come up after being quiet for a few moments to tell me she's happy now which leads me to believe that my baby girl was sad just moments before. :( I love that she's learning to express her emotions though, including times where she does tell me "Claire sad", and hope that she continues to share her feelings with me even as she gets older.

Gavin's not really saying the dardest things yet (cut him a break, he's 3 months old!), but what he doesn't say, he definitely makes up for in volume. He's cooing and babbling and will sometimes let out a super load "ah!" that startles both himself and me.

Parents of the Year Entry

2010-02-12T20:52:00.000-06:00

We're "snowed in" (Texas-style), which is unfortunate since I didn't go grocery shopping prior so we've been foraging for food. Tonight, I decided to go for Mother of the Year and heat up pizza rolls and tator tots, however Claire couldn't wait for the 11-18 minutes it would take for everything to get done, so this is what she had for dinner:

She managed to eat about 1/4 of the pint -- including the entire chocolate layer on top -- before declaring "all done". This is my official entry for the Parents of the Year award. It's early, however, so there may be others before the year is out.

Before you judge me too much, though, I have lots of other posts between 1/1 and now including ones talking about how domesticated I've become during my temporary SAHM-ness. You'll just have to visit again and scroll down to see the older posts, but I thought this one was priceless.

Happy New Year!

2009-12-31T21:34:00.004-06:00

What in incredible year. Not only did my baby turn 1, I had another baby. James and I celebrated 8 years of marriage, and it's hard to imagine life being any better. I'm so grateful for all of my friends and family and the joy they bring into our lives. I hope 2010 is just as full of blessings and wonderful memories (though no babies for me!).

(click image to enlarge)

Love of Labor: The Sequel

2009-12-27T19:12:00.016-06:00

About a lifetime ago (okay, just under two years, but who's counting?), I wrote about my love of labor. While "love" may be a strong word, it certainly wasn't the worst experience in the world, and I have to say "ditto" this time around. Havin' Gavin was even easier than when I had Claire! Here's the timeline of Friday, December 25, 2009 (yes, Christmas morning):

4:00am: Contractions started and woke me from a light sleep. Let's face it; sleeping deeply and comfortably the last few weeks is a treat when it actually happens. This time I was pretty sure I knew they were contractions based on the irregular contractions I had the day before while James and I were at the movies ("The Blind Side" ... excellent movie even with contractions during the whole thing!). They were about 9-10 minutes apart, no too painful.
5:30am: 1-Minute long contractions were 5 minutes apart, so I start monitoring. An hour of these suckers, and I call the doctor.
6:10am: The contractions are getting stronger to where I don't really want to talk while my insides are squeezing. I'm ready to call the doctor ... just 20 more minutes. I go to take a shower, stopping to breathe through the pain.
6:25am: James wakes up at his normal time and sees me straining and bending over while holding on to the counter. I tell him I'm waiting until 6:30 to call the doctor. He tells me I'm silly.
6:30am: I'm hitting Send on my cell phone having already dialed and stared at the minute hand until it hit the 6. I talk to the answering service who says they're going to call the doctor (mine, actually, since she was on call) who will then call me back.
6:38am: Dr. Jaffee calls me, obviously having been roused from bed. I apologize for calling her 1) so early; 2) on Chrismas morning of all mornings; and 3) the morning after an ice storm. She tells me not to worry and to head to the hospital.
6:45am: James and I head to the hospital driving on roads iced over from the Texas-style blizzard the night before. I've reclined the seat and am eating graham crackers and drinking a glass of milk just in case it's awhile before I get to eat again. We pass some abandoned cars along the way -- James stopped to roll down the windows so that he could ask other drivers what was wrong (ie an iced-over bridge?) while I thought he was going to offer assistance. No one is in the cars, and the roads seem driveable. We did manage to slide past the entrance into the hospital parking lot but made the next entrance without any problems.
7:00am: I'm in my nice comfy labor and delivery room. This time around, James gets to see what contractions look like; it's not pretty.

This is what a Way-Way contraction looks like.
I may look like I'm smiling, but I'm not happy!

To my surprise, I discovered that Plano Presby has gone all "Earth Mother" in terms of their labor, delivery, and post-partum process. It's been less than two years since I was last admitted, and already things had changed, at least for "regular" births.

They room-in all babies now starting at birth. No longer do they whisk away the baby (and daddy) to the nursery to do the cleaning, measuring, and shots; everything is done bedside for the mommy to watch. Same goes for at night; you have to explicitly request them to take your baby away -- and probably have a good reason -- or else baby's in the room with you. The only time they usually take the baby is to get checked out by the pediatricians in the morning and for the circumcisions (if applicable, of course).
Rules about nothing touching your lips except ice chips after you are admitted are gone. You can drink pretty much anything except for orange juice while in labor, and they also provide jello and popsicles. I remember with Claire I was gulping down water at the entrance just outside the L&D wing because I knew it was my last chance, and who knew when I'd be able to drink again?!
No more Soothies. Yup, no free paci provided by the hospital because they are hoping to encourage more breastfeeding.
Everyone's a lactationist. You thought there were boob nazis before? Now everyone on staff is trained in lactation consulting! I mean, I'll be breastfeeding so it's nice that anyone can help me, but it must be intimidating for people who don't have the option to feed from their boobs.
There is a mandatory "nap time" during the day for mommies and babies. Well, they can't force you to sleep, but during the hours of 1pm-4pm, it's quiet time on the floor where they discourage any visitors so that mommies and babies (and daddies!) can actually get some rest.

I know there's other stuff, but that's just a sampling of what I found to be different. Back to the timeline:

7:30am: IV is in to pump me full of fluids, I've been admitted to the hospital, and James has already paid for what is to come with his credit card. Oh, and I'm eagerly waiting the epidural that should be ready any minute now. James uses the free wifi to search for "relaxing music" on Pandora, Enya fills the room, and I say, "are you kidding me?!" and request The Killers instead. "Mr. Brightside" is an awesome labor song, btw. :) 3-4cm dilated; 90% effaced.
8:00am: Anesthesiologist is there to do the epidural. She inserts the needle ... bone. Inserts ... bone ... jabs ... bone ... adjusts ... bone ... gives me more local anesthetic ... sticks some more ... bone. Repeat for another 20-25 minutes and then calls for back-up. In the meantime, I have asked the nurse how much worse she think the pain will get from the contractions I'm already having. She tells me they won't hurt much worse that what I'm enduring now, and I start considering just foregoing the epidural altogether.
8:30am: Backup anesthesiologist shows up just as the first says "a-ha!" and finds the right spot for that needle. I'm glad her spirits weren't ruined by an unsuccessful epidural on Christmas! She cheerfully finishes the procedure while telling me all the while that I almost missed the window and would have progressed too far if much more time had passed! James tells me later at one point when she pulled out the needle after another unsuccessful try, the needle looked like it was actually bent. Gross.
8:35am: Bliss. Tingly feet, warm legs, no pain bliss. We sit back to wait for the next few hours. My nurse laughs as she adjusts me again; for some reason, I kept wanting to slide to the left side of the bed, and she was scared I'd just slither to the floor at some point. With the good meds, though, I doubt I would have cared.
8:45am: Dr. Jaffee comes in with a smile on her face. She checks and says I'm about 7-8cm dilated, 95% effaced, and will probably deliver by noon. She prescribes some petocin to speed things up along a little more, breaks my water, and leaves to do rounds. My nurse jokes that she could probably just wave the pitocin under my nose seeing as how quickly I'm progressing and depresses the tiny amount into my IV via a syringe (rather than having to hook up an actual bag).
9:00am: I sit back and start texting people and surfing on my iPhone. Might as well relax during my last few hours. Talk to Corrie on the phone to say hello and tell her that I'll probably deliver by noon.
9:20am: Dr. Jaffee comes back and says "yup, you're ready to push". HUH?!?!?! Um, okay. She suits up while all the funny stuff happens (ie, they take off the end of the bed and turn on the "you're going to shine THOSE lights WHERE?!" fixtures).
9:29am: Contraction starts. Push, breathe, push, breath, push, breathe. Contraction ends, and I relax.
9:30am: Next contraction starts. Push, breathe, DON'T push on direction of doctor (let gravity do the work!), breathe ... GAVIN IS BORN!

Gavin De-Xiang Pee
Born 12/25/09 @ 9:30am
7lb 10oz; 19.3 inches

Seriously, that was it. Jen, my nurse, said it went even better than textbook, and Dr. Jaffee concurred adding that she's also amazed since I'm so not a complainer. I smiled a little guitily thinking about all those pity parties I've been throwing myself recently. :)

By 10:30, we were all scrubbed, cleaned, and settled into our post-partum room. I like to think that all the stuff I whined about the last month of pregnancy (the hips that were no longer aligned, the weird phantom aches, the jelly joints) all allowed for a blissfully easy delivery. Yay!

Gavin is an incredible baby so far. He's got my nose -- my mom kept commenting about the big nose, James' eyes, and lots of hair. He seems to be a good sleeper (crossing fingers!) and a pretty good eater. The family came up to visit on Christmas evening, and Claire immediately took to her little brother. She's going to be a great big sis.

First family picture

I was supposed to check-out on Sunday morning (the 27th) but after talking to Dr. Jaffee and Dr. Frank on Saturday morning, they said that Gavin and I were both doing great and were welcome to check-out early and go home if we wanted. After a quick discussion, James and I decided to take the plunge. If we're going to be rooming in anyways and everyone is healthy, why not just go home? So after we used up all our free meal vouchers and watched "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" -- which I do NOT recommend watching just hours after you've had a baby -- we headed home to face the real world which I'm sure you'll be reading about soon.

I'm going to do my best to try and keep up with the blogs (mine, Claire's, and Gavin's) but be patient with me as I have a feeling there will be an adjustment period coming up for all of us.

I'll also be posting lots of pictures in the December photo album as I go through them, so come back and visit often!

Baby Pee - 39-Week Appointment

2009-12-22T14:10:00.004-06:00

Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, baby boy. I had hoped not to make it all the way to the 39-week appointment. Over the last few days, I've continued to get larger and more uncomfortable, but no baby yet.

On Sunday night about 11pm, I realized that Gavin hadn't really been moving much, so I was extra-vigilent yesterday to track his movements. His activity was definitely less than it has been, both in frequency and intensity, so last night was not a restful one for me (went to sleep at 11:45pm, woke up at 1:45am, and stayed up until 5:30am before taking a nap until 6:30am). I figure that he's really just out of room but let the nurse know when I got to my appointment today, and she immediately hooked me up to the machine that I had used at my 28-week appointment. I have to say, when I first heart the heartbeat echo through the room, a wave of relief washed over me.

There still wasn't much movement, so I got to drink a can of Coke and sit some more. After reviewing the charts, Dr. Jaffee said that there's enough movement (there were about 10 jabs/kicks/rolls within about 40 minutes) that she's not concerned but to continue being sensitive to his movements. At a minimum, I should feel 5 "somethings" within the hour after eating a meal; with all of the OJ and Sprite that I've been having, no real problems there!

In other news, I'm 3cm dilated, thinned out, and Gavin is nice and low. Dr. Jaffee also noted that at least one of my "movements" that I marked during the monitoring today was actually a contraction and not Gavin just rolling over like I thought. Huh, who knew!? Given the progress since my last appointment, it's likely that I'll deliver sometime this week; and now that I know what I'm feeling is actually contractions, I can start keeping track. Here's to hoping!

Baby Pee - 38-Week Appointment

2009-12-17T21:30:00.002-06:00

Had my 38-Week Appointment. Best way to summarize how it went is when Dr. Jaffee said, "hmmm ... doesn't look like he's ready to come out; it could be that he's coming after Christmas", my response was "Seriously?! Are you sure?! Do you want to check again?!" Sigh, still pregnant.

Besides just being big and uncomfortable, I'm also hoping Gavin will make his appearance in the next few days because Dr. Jaffee is on-call all of next week through Christmas but then she's going on vacation the next week after. I promised her that I was going to try and do a lot of walking over the weekend. Wish me luck!

Baby Pee - 37-Week Appointment

2009-12-10T15:55:00.003-06:00

Another week, and I'm STILL pregnant. I am so over being preggers. I LOVE feeling the baby move and knowing that he's right there with me all the time, but I'm tired of feeling so ungainly, the aching hips, and the fear that if I sit down I'll never get back up. Plus, I'm just ready to meet him!

Not too much to add about the appointment. I lost the pound I gained at last week's appointment, my blood pressure is back to normal from last week as well, and his heartbeat sounds great. Dr. Jaffee had problems actually checking my cervix this week -- it STILL cracks me up that I have a "narrow pelvis" ... do I LOOK like I have a narrow pelvis?! Seriously?! Sheesh. -- but she said that it's softening for sure and that his head is definitely engaged.

I asked if she could take a guess at about how big he is today, and by measuring his length and "cheating" a bit by using Claire's stats, her guess is that he's probably about 5 1/2 pounds and that he'll probably be about the same size as Claire when he comes out. Guess I'll just keep on baking then!

Baby Pee - 36-Week Appointment

2009-12-03T16:35:00.001-06:00

Starting this week (and every week following), Dr. Jaffee is checking to see how I'm coming along. Just so folks know, it's NOT a comfortable exam ... think back to that first sonogram but more uncomfortable. :P

So where am I? Not dilated at all (I believe exact words were "still completely closed"), but he is definitely head down. Given that there just isn't room left for him to really move around, it's unlikely he'll be changing that position before he comes.

I asked whether he's dropped at all, and she said not really. Apparently second (and subsequent) babies tend to drop late and moms tend to efface late but dilate early. *shrug* She would know. :) I'm a little surprised that he hasn't engaged yet given that everytime he moves his head right now, I feel like I'm going to pee on myself, but I guess it's going to get worse before it gets better.

People at the office are starting to get nervous, I think. Besides the fact that I'm lumbering around and am as big as a house, I'm having problems in my right hip, so I'll suddenly stop while walking around to massage my hip (okay, my butt) and shake it out. Multiple times this week I had to ensure people that I was NOT in labor and was NOT having contractions ... but then how do you explain that I was just having aches, joint locking, nerve pinching pain in my right hip? Nobody wants to know that. I DO have the fear of my water breaking at work, though, which is why I'm going to try and work from home as much as I can until the baby is here. Ugh, can you just imagine?!

We're officially on baby watch! I've also got girlfriends at work and James at home on "Belly Watch" which means they have to make sure my outfit is covering my entire belly. You know you're at the end of the pregnancy where even your maternity shirts are too short, and no way do I want to be THAT person. :D

Havin' a Gavin

2009-11-27T09:50:00.000-06:00

Well, it's officially been two whole weeks and we haven't changed our minds yet, so it looks like JJ is going to be "Gavin". It's probably the only name that managed to get on both of our "top" lists for any amount of time, and we haven't been able to come up with any inappropriate "Pee" jokes to defile it.

I don't know why it was so incredibly hard for us to choose a boy name. Back in 2007 when we were trying to come up with a girl name, we had a boy name all picked out ("Xander") and thought finding a girl name was impossible. This time around, I guess because we actually had the responsibility of choosing the boy name, nothing seemed to stick! Of course, there's always the possibility that no matter what we name him on his birth certificate, I may just end up calling him "JJ" anyways. :)

Apparently I like names that belong to kids growing up in the Upper East side of Manhattan: Cooper, Carter, Eamon ... I just can't help myself. And then James seems to prefer names that belong in the NBA or NFL; hard to find much compromise here.

Some of our funnier name stories:

Name story #1: I originally thought the name "Ian" would be perfect because I thought it was the Celtic version of James. Ian Pee! Well, I do some quick Googling and find that Ian is the Celtic version of John and that the Celtic version of James is ... wait for it ... Seamus. SEAMUS PEE?! No way. Even after I found out it was pronounced SHAY-mus, it still doesn't fly for me even though James thought it was hilarious. You can thank me later, my son. :)
Name story #2: Another idea was to try to find names of famous James' (or Jimmies). I liked Carter but then the thought of having a Claire and a Carter, both perfectly fine retail stores but odd to name your children after them, was a little too much. Somehow we stumbled on Hendrix of Jimi Hendrix. Hendrix / Hendricks! After giving it more thought, it didn't stick. Would we be naming Hendrick after the motorsports company -- go Jimmie Johnson! -- or after the gin? It was just too much.
Name story #3: We even thought about going "out there" with names, and James got hooked on Orion. I was okay with Orson and would even consider Apollo (if Ono can do it, maybe we could, too), but I just couldn't buy into Orion which was a perfect reason for James to get stuck on it and torment me which gave me even more reason to stick to Quinn (which I still love) but James would not OK because it reminds him of Dr. Quinn, medicine woman, too much.

The actual name "Gavin" is a Welsh name that means "white hawk of battle". Well, those Hunan people were quite the warriors, so I guess that works. Plus, it's a variant of Gawain, one of King Arthur's knights of the Round Table, which definitely works for me. Claire's middle name (De-Ling) means "a wing to fly"; odd considering how I'm not exactly a bird person, huh?

No promises that we'll actually leave the hospital with a "Gavin" and not an Ian, Quinn, or Orion, so no personalization, embroidery, or announcements yet, but at least this should appease you people who have been dying to know!

Baby Pee - 34-Week Appointment

2009-11-19T19:42:00.004-06:00

Back at my 30-Week appointment, I made a note about how it seems like appointments seem to run late more in the afternoon than in the mornings, so of course there was an emergency this morning to where both OBs from my office were stuck in surgery well past their 7:30am scheduled C-section times. Come 9:30, they still weren't back at the offices which left them a whole lot of impatient patients in their exam and waiting rooms. I was fine though; nothing to get my heart rate up over. :)

The appointment was fine. After assuring the doctor that waiting is not that big a deal for me -- it's nice to know that she gives you the proper amount of attention; I feel good knowing that she would do the same for me in the same situation! -- she let me know that the baby's heart rate is good and that I gained three pounds in the last two weeks. Whoops. And that was with my haircut and everything!

I think the only question I had for her is whether I should be doing anything to try and get JJ to move down (he's sitting somewhere around my lungs/neck right now; a perfect shelf for that bowl of ice cream!). She said no, it's still too early, then added "but there's not really anything you need to do anyways; he'll move down when he's ready to move down". Well, I'M ready for him to move down, so I hope he gets on board soon. Although, I have appreciated that the trade-off that I've been able to hold onto my bladder throughout the pregnancy even if I haven't been able to breathe.

Next appointment is in two weeks, at which time Dr. Jaffee will start checking my cervix (softening? widening? whatever) and I'll start going to see her every week. It's absolutely incredible how quickly this pregnancy has gone!

Tamales & Baby Sprinkle

2009-11-14T14:49:00.018-06:00

Made tamales for the first time today at Michelle's with Kim and Heather. It was quite fun! A lot like making egg rolls, you first make the inside ingredients and then sit down to roll everything up. I managed to make a bunch of "finger tamales" (think the size of your pinky) because it seemed like such a shame to just toss those corn husk sections when they were still perfectly usable even if they were teeny, tiny. I'll call them "Claire-sized" tamales. :) The only downside of creating tamales is it's not really a "one to make, one to eat" type of activity like making cookies where you end up with about 1/2 the cookies since the other 1/2 of the batter gets eaten throughout!

Me and Kim

Heather and Michelle

Hard at work

My playgroup hosted a baby sprinkle -- that is, a light shower -- for Baby Pee today. It was hosted by Flo, Cathy G, and Cathy B, and I am so grateful and honored that they would do something like that for me, especially with everything else going on in their lives right now. I started the whole "sprinkle" thing within the playgroup when the first moms got pregnant (I think it was Maya first, then Cathy) never thinking that I would be in the same position just a few months later!

Troublemakers

Here's Baby Sprinkle pics that Cathy took (thank goodness someone did!). I only managed to get a couple; you can see more in our November album.

Locks of Beautiful Lengths

2009-11-14T13:47:00.011-06:00

Cut my hair, finally. Back in March (yes, March), I had planned to do my normal trim, but my hair appointment was canceled because of a work thing. Same thing happened in May, and by the time July rolled around and I had to cancel my appointment for the THIRD time, I decided that it was a sign that I should take advantage of "pregnancy hair" and grow it out to donate.

Before

After

I ended up cutting off a 12" braid and plan to donate it either to Locks of Love or Pantene Beautiful Lengths. I knew that if I didn't make time to do this now, I would probably end up not doing it for awhile. I was actually quite impressed by how much was cut off as well as how healthy my hair was. Seriously, ladies, pregnancy hair is awesome.

Funny thing is, my hair now is probably closer to the "old" me -- pre-pregnancies? -- before I started skipping hair appointments to hang out with my baby girl. James seems to like it; probably reminds him of the days when we were young and carefree. :)

Now I'm trying to decide whether to donate the thing to Locks of Love or to Pantene Beautiful Lengths. Both are very honorable organizations that help deserving recipients. Either way, I need to get this thing out of my house soon or else I fear it'll be laying around forever!

UPDATE 11/24 - Decided to go with Locks of Love. My reasoning is because Locks of Love requires a minimum of 10", and with my 12" braid, I have more than enough. Pantene Beautiful Lengths only requires 8", so I figure I can easily donate to them in the future. And, I mailed it off, so that thing is out of my hair (pun intended!)

My Friend Charley

2009-11-07T07:06:00.005-06:00

What could be more unpleasant than waking up to a pager (I'm on call this week) at 5:48am? Perhaps already being up when the pager went off because you're still coming off the rolling aches in your legs from getting a crazy charley horse in the middle of the night! And, I swear, this sucker was in a part of my leg that there is no muscle ... up and down the outside of the lower leg between the calf and shin?

I don't know if every woman gets them when they're pregnant, but I remember getting them with Claire. Back then, I would leap out of bed, flail around like crazy, stomp my legs, crack up laughing at the absurdity of it all, and walk it off. Couldn't exactly do the same thing this morning when I found myself struck while sleeping in Claire's bed (I fell asleep there at 9:30 last night while putting her to sleep; 3rd trimester narcolepsy) ... while trapped on the side closest to the wall ... with Claire somehow wormed to the end of the bed blocking the exit. Trapped in my own pretty, pretty pink pillow hell! I did manage, however, to leap up in bed -- surprisingly agile for a pregnant lady -- and stand up hugging the wall, shouting in silence.

After the 4th one subsided (because they come in waves), I managed to wiggle my way off the bed, reposition Claire in the bed, and headed off to my own bed where I stared at the windows (pregnancy forces side sleeping so no staring at the ceiling) for the next 45 minutes until the BRRRRRNNNNNNNGGGGG, BRRRRRNNNNNGGG of the pager jerked me awake just as I was drifting off.

As I was working the ticket, Claire woke up asking for Mommy. I figure this was a good trial run of what it will be like when we have 2. Drift off to sleep and the other wakes up; working one issue when another rises. Should be interesting.

Good news is, I was able to fix the ticket! I did call in moral support to talk me off the ledge, but I did figure out the solution myself. Yay! Off to ... well, I probably won't be going back to bed, but off to my next adventure.

Baby Pee - 32-Week Appointment

2009-11-05T14:33:00.002-06:00

Low-key appointment today. I managed to gain another 2 pounds in 2 weeks, but who's counting (oh, that's right, *I* am). The doctor and nurse both said it's fine; a pound a week here at the end is no problem even if I'm not happy about it. I measured at 33 weeks (just a tad bigger than the 32 weeks that I'm at gestationally) but it was well within the expected measurements plus part of that can be due to what direction JJ is turned right now.

JJ moved around during the appointment trying to evade the mic, but we finally held him still long enough to listen to his heart which sounds great. Judging from where she was able to get his heartbeat, the guess is that he's head down still, but we'll know for sure in a few weeks when she starts checking my cervix during my appointments. I noticed yesterday that whenever JJ gets really active kicking, his kicks seem to directly impact another one of my organs now. Stretches up, I need to pee immediately; kicks to the left, my stomach rumbles and I get nauseated; punches to the right, and my back hurts. I wonder if actual bruising occurs in my insides?

I also got my H1N1 shot today. Our office offered it, but I wanted to make sure I got the good stuff. While I was at the office, I heard quite a few calls come in with folks asking for the vaccine availability, and they turned away a lot of people with the explanation that they're saving their handful of mercury-free shots for the pregnant ladies in their third trimester.

That's about it, really. Claire's big girl room is all done, and she loves her bed (the epitome of what "pink" looks like if it exploded) ... and has been sleeping in the bed all by herself! I'm there for when she goes down, but then she sleeps by herself at night. Yay! I'll post pictures of it soon. The nursery, on the other hand, is NOT done. And we have no name yet. Sigh.

Cardiologist

2009-10-26T17:17:00.006-05:00

I figured I'd put at the beginning the most important thing: the heart looks great. Overall, the cardiologist appointment this afternoon went really well. Dr. Kurichety is very personable, and he immediately put both James and I at ease. I got an EKG and a sonogram (of the heart, not the baby), and the results were perfect. The sonographer did give us a little peek of JJ at the end of my screening, and it was kind of funny because she kept finding the heart while she was looking for him. I guess that IS her job. :)

There was no reason to put me on a monitor since they only monitor for 24 hours, and since my episodes have happened so sporadically, there really isn't any need. The biggest concern would have been if they found something that would cause concern during labor and delivery or if I would need extra monitoring for the big day, but it doesn't look like there's anything to worry about at this time. I'm going to follow-up in about a month to see if there's still any concerns, but I'm so close at this point to having JJ (9 weeks to due date!), I think I'll just stick it out. The only thing would be if it gets worse before it gets better (a common theme with pregnancy, really), and then I call him.

In other news, I was able to take a full breath today which lead me to believe that JJ's starting to move down a little bit. Suddenly the mound that sat high in my chest is around my middle which is great. I can breath and nothing is beating up my bladder ... yet. He's moving a ton, which is really fun, and I can't wait to meet him!

I also bid my feet farewell this morning. It was raining so I figured I should wear my boots. I struggled with the socks and the boots and finally had to sit down to finish the task. Goodbye, feet, goodbye.

Baby Pee - 30-Week Appointment

2009-10-22T22:11:00.000-05:00

Hard to believe that I'm already going to the OB every 2 weeks! This pregnancy really has just flown by, and - in true Way-Way / Mommy / uber-planner fashion - I have had a couple of mini freak outs. Cases in point:

On Monday (the 19th, mind you), I got it in my head that I need to finish the nursery NOW. In fact, I need to finish in YESTERDAY but my turn-back-time machine seems to be in the shop. The need was so great, I decided I needed to go shopping THIS WEEKEND instead of waiting just one more week until Partners Card week (that would be the 30th ... 11 days from the freak out) to get the mattresses and furniture. Talking to Kim and Michelle got me off the ledge, though, and I decided to focus my energies elsewhere ... for now.
Speaking of redirecting my energies, this week I've really been focusing on baby names. I feel like I'm constantly throwing out names to James, sometimes the same one 4 or 5 times just to see if he'll change his mind. Finally he finally said "why do you feel like you need the name today?" and I said something to the effect of "I feel like SOMETHING needs to happen to get ready for this baby! Do you realize I can count on my HANDS how many weeks we have left of this pregnancy, and we have NOTHING DONE!??!?!!?!?"
The best had something to do with "I'm 30 weeks pregnant! Claire was born 8 weeks from now!!!!!!!" which seems to make no sense unless you know that Claire was born at 38 weeks. Listen to what I mean, not what I say.

Luckily for everyone around me, I have been able to contain the freakouts for the most part and hidden them from the public. My credit card, however, has not fared nearly as well. Retail therapy, right?

The appointment itself was fine. JJ's heartbeat sounds great, and he's moving around a ton. This morning, he did some crazy somersault that I'm pretty sure involved a trapeze and maybe a diving board; as long as he didn't manage to flip himself into a breach position (he's been head down every sonogram I've had) then it's fine. I'm measuring right at 30 weeks, and I managed to gain 2.5 pounds in 2.3 weeks; glad that wasn't the rate that I gained this entire pregnancy! I look as though I have strapped a very large bowling ball to the front of my body, and walking after I've been at rest for awhile is definitely a challenge.

The last thing is I mentioned how I've had a couple of instances where my heart rate seems to go up, and I have a hard time bringing it back down. I mentioned it at my last appointment, and Dr. Jaffee said I should cut out caffeine (not an issue; already done even before the pregnancy, really) and chocolate (harder but do-able for the baby). It happened a couple of other times in the two weeks since my appointment, so she went ahead and referred me to a cardiologist just to check it out. The last was last weekend where my heart rate hung out at about 120 for just under an hour -- I know watching Claire in swim lessons is a little scary, but this was extreme even for me. My doc said she thinks it's nothing and quite common during pregnancy (hormones, increased blood flow, etc) and I've had no blackouts or chest pain, but no reason not to get it checked out. Yay, insurance!

Interesting pregnancy facts from the Internet (because the first thing you do when the doctor says anything medical, like "tachyarrythmia" is look it up ... which, btw, I do not recommend looking up in Wikipedia unless I want to scare myself with things that I know have nothing to do with me right now):

Heart and Blood Flow: During pregnancy, the woman's heart must work harder because as the fetus grows, the heart must pump more blood to the uterus. By the end of pregnancy, the uterus is receiving one fifth of the woman's prepregnancy blood supply. During pregnancy, the amount of blood pumped by the heart (cardiac output) increases by 30 to 50%. As cardiac output increases, the heart rate at rest speeds up from a normal prepregnancy rate of about 70 beats per minute to 80 or 90 beats per minute. During exercise, cardiac output and heart rate increase more when a woman is pregnant than when she is not. During labor, cardiac output increases by an additional 10%. After delivery, cardiac output decreases rapidly at first, then more slowly. It returns to the prepregnancy level about 6 weeks after delivery.

Certain heart murmurs and irregularities in heart rhythm may appear because the heart is working harder. Sometimes a pregnant woman may feel these irregularities. Such changes are normal during pregnancy. However, other abnormal heart sounds and rhythms (for example, diastolic murmurs and tachyarrythmias), which occur more often in pregnant women, may require treatment.

I have my appointment on Monday, so you can come back here and check out the result, but like Dr. Jaffee says, I'm not worried at all and am pretty sure it's nothing. It's not like I was exactly an Olympic athlete before this pregnancy, after all, so it's no wonder my body is complaining a bit at everything I'm putting it through. I should probably just be grateful that I'm still able to get down to the floor to play with Claire AND get back up again, albeit slowly and completely ungracefully!

Something I've noticed for future reference (though not for me since I don't think we'll be having any more) is that the OB's office seems to run behind in the afternoons unlike in the mornings (something about babies being born or something). Plus, it's a lot harder to drop whatever I'm doing at work that day to sneak off to a doctors office; much easier to just not start anything yet at all. Note to self, shoot for morning appointments!

Seriously?!

2009-10-13T16:29:00.004-05:00

So, after getting lots of "are you okay?" queries from folks, I realized I never updated from my last appointment on how JJ is doing. On Wednesday, he was still sort of quiet but started picking back up. On Thursday, he was back to his old self, and since then, he's been giving Pele a run for his "Athlete of the Century" title. Not that I want you to, but I'm at the point where you can physically see my stomach moving when he kicks .. though I refuse to think about whether that's just my fat jiggling from the force. :) Thanks for all the well-wishes and inquiries!

My "Seriously?!" title from something I stumbled on today. This is something I already knew, but it blows my mind every time:

United States is one of only five countries out of 173 that does not guarantee some form of paid maternity leave. (The other countries are Lesotho, Liberia, Swaziland, and Papua New Guinea).

Us and Swaziland ... how proud we must be. In fact, "fathers are granted paid paternity leave or paid parental leave in sixty-five countries; thirty one of these countries offer at least fourteen weeks of paid leave". Needless to say, the U.S. does not guarantee this to fathers.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Work-life_balance

C'mon, US, get with the program!

Baby Pee - 28-Week Appt

2009-10-06T20:24:00.001-05:00

Had my Week 28 appointment with Dr. Jaffee today. It was supposed to be on Thursday, but I called the office this morning to get it moved up today because I was a little nervous -- okay, a LOT nervous -- that JJ was not moving around like his usual self.

Typically in the morning, right when I wake up and roll over, he gives me some strong good morning kicks and punches to say hello. Then, throughout the day, I get poked, prodded, and stretched by various arms, legs, elbows, and fingers as a reminder to who I'm carrying. Yesterday, when I woke up there was none of the usual, and then throughout the day, there were very few rumblings. I even took the time to stop at my desk to gaze and assess ... nothing. By the end of the day, I was getting a little trepiditious, so I got a 7-Up to try and wake him up with some sugar. Nothing except for some very light fluttering. Later in the evening, James went and bought me a variety of drinks to try and stimulate some movement; I went through orange juice and apple juice but nothing more than a bloated belly and a couple of tickles. Needless to say, sleeping was not restful or easy last night.

By this morning, the second morning that there were no morning calenthenics, I decided to call the doctor. Right when they opened at 9, I started dialing on my phone. I told the receptionist that I had an appointment on Thursday but wanted to see if they could fit me in today because I hadn't felt the baby move much the last 24 hours. She said she could get me an appointment later that day but put me on hold to talk to the nurse. She came back on the phone and asked how far along I was, and I told her "it's my 28th week", she relayed the message, and came back to tell me to come in immediately. Scary.

When they brought me in, we headed to the sonogram room after I gave my "sample" and found out that I gained 4 pounds in the last 3 weeks and confirmed that my blood pressure is a little high. Whoops. I blame the blood pressure on my nervousness but I admit the weight gain is all me. They hooked me up to the fetal monitor (you know, the one that squishes your stomach fat really tightly like doughboy rolls ... oh, you don't know? harrumph) so that it could document his heartbeat, and then I was given a trigger to push everytime I felt JJ move in the slightest. After about 15-17 LOOOOONG minutes of holding the trigger and monitor, waiting for bumps, and being entertained by James, Dr. Jaffee came back in to check the results and said 10 movements (even the slight ones) was pretty good for that time period but wanted to go ahead and have the sonographer come in.

The sonographer showed us that everything looked good -- at 27w2d, JJ's head is measuring at 26w6d, his femur bone at 28w2d, and he weighs about 2lb5oz -- which was definitely reassuring. I'll post the pictures from my various sonograms soon. My sugar test also came back with favorable results; the only thing is I need to take iron supplements which also happened with Claire (which James reminded me of since I had already blocked it out of my memory).

Whew! I'm hoping that's the last of the worries as I have enough to deal with as we go into this last trimester (ie "What should we name the baby?!" or "What do we do with Claire if I go into labor in the middle of the night?!").

The Allergist

2009-09-30T20:58:00.002-05:00

We had our follow-up visit with the allergist today. A few weeks ago, I decided to take Claire in for testing after she had her contact reaction to hummus (everywhere after I wiped it off her face -- and there was a lot of it since we gave her the container to lick -- left red marks!) and then some random reactions to who-knows-what.

I chose Dr. Schmitt because he's board certified for pediatric allergies, which I thought was a nice distinction. After meeting him, I think he's a good choice as he seems to spend ample time with his patients and answers all of my questions and then some. Our first consult gave me a lot of information to consider, and I decided to have her blood drawn rather than trying to figure out how to restrain a toddler for 20 minutes while they pricked her skin.

I'm not sure who was more traumatized by the blood being drawn, Claire or me. Many of you have probably had blood drawn as an adult ... well, it's the exact same thing for a toddler. Same needle in the arm; same vials to be filled. Again, I have to brag about what an amazing person Claire is. Even though she had tears running down her face and kept repeating "boo-boo, boo-boo", she sat in my lap and didn't move her arm. Afterwards, after we left the lab, there were definitely post-trauma tears (and a little shaking by Mommy), but overall we survived.

A couple of days later, I got a message from the dr's office to say that the results are back and until we had time to do our consult, we should stay away from peanuts, eggs, and all melons. You think it sounds easy, but I almost immediately gave her watermelon (which she had no reaction and loves) and James gave her ranch dressing which has mayonnaise (which is made of egg whites) to which she did have a reaction.

Today we did our consult to hear the exact results. Essentially, Claire has been set up by her two parents to be a perfect candidate for asthma, eczema, and allergies. Sorry, babe. Her strongest reactions are to peanut, eggs, and canteloupe, but there was a host of other things that she had some level of reaction to in the labs (I'm serious, the list was astonishing).

We can continue to give her eggs if they're baked/fried because the high-temp cooking seems to change the composition of the egg proteins (which is what you're allergic to), but we're definitely going to be more careful. We'll be staying away from all nuts, which is fine, but can use our discretion on things that "may contain trace nuts" or are "processed on machinery that also processes nuts" because the allergist said that there is no real governance on those labels. To be safe, we'll stay away from canteloupe and honeydew (which, not sure if you've noticed, but "fresh fruit" anywhere you go is usually canteloupe, honeydew, watermelon, and pineapple), but I don't think we'll be giving up watermelon which the allergist said is fine as long as she hasn't had a reaction and loves it.

Some good news, the test for shrimp was negative as were the tests for environmental factors (mold, pollen, dust, animals, etc). The allergist also gave us some recommendations on the medications that her pediatrician has prescribed -- and concurred with his assessments, which I really liked on the part of both doctors! -- and will work with us moving forward on a treatment plan long-term.

Whew! It's a lot to consider, but I'm definitely in the camp that is glad to know. So remember, dear reader, no peanuts (or nuts), straight eggs, or canteloupes/honeydew for our little one. I do NOT intend to use that Epi-Pen anytime soon ... or EVER!

John Bunn is Back

2009-09-30T20:38:00.004-05:00

With cold and flu season running from October through April and all the craziness with this whole H1N1 swine flu, I knew it was just a matter of time before John Bunn (our "beloved" nebulizer) made his reappearance. Then, after Claire got her third fever in the month of September (every other weekend) along with the rattling in the chest, I knew that time was now.

The first time we took out the nebulizer this week, Claire freaked out ... screaming, crying, and scrambling to get away. It was awful, much like the first time all over again. The second time was better, and by the third, she was a champ. I'm so impressed by my little girl and how brave she is. She can effectively tell us, "Claire. Nose. Scared.", yet she will sit there and take deep breaths to inhale the smoke until we're "All Done! Yay!".

The last two September fever incidents, Claire got sick on Friday night or Saturday morning and was easily recovered by Monday. This time, it hit Monday morning, so James and I have been taking turns staying home from work to stay with her. The doctor found on Monday that she has strep, so she's on antibiotics, but no flu. However, the fever lingers, and I even had to pick her up from school today because she was fine all day until about 4:30pm when she got another fever after recesse.

Guess I'll be home again tomorrow! I think it would be more enjoyable if I weren't worried about her and trying to keep her semi-quarentined, but I love being home with Claire and believe she likes it, too, even if she does probably get bored of me by the end of the day. :)

Katie Kirkpatrick

2009-09-22T15:03:00.007-05:00

Got this email from Jenny today, and it affected me enough that I feel I need to share.

Her name is Katie Kirkpatrick, 21 yrs old. Next to her is her fiancé, Nick, 23. This picture was taken prior to their wedding January 11th, 2005. Katie has terminal cancer and spends hours in chemotherapy. Here Nick awaits while she finishes one of the sessions...

Even in pain and dealing with her organs shutting down, with the help of morphine, Katie took care of every single part of the wedding planning. Her dress had to be adjusted several times due to Katie's constant weight loss.

An expected guest was her oxygen tank. Katie had to use it during the ceremony and reception. The other couple in this picture is Nick's parents, very emotional with the wedding and of course to see their son marrying the girl he fell in love when he was an adolescent.

Katie, in a wheel chair listening to her husband and friends singing to her.

In the middle of the party, Katie had to rest for a bit and catch her breath. The pain does not allow her to stand for long period of time.

Katie died 5 days after her wedding. To see a fragile woman dress as bride with a beautiful smile makes you think... happiness is always there within reach, no matter how long it lasts.....let's enjoy life and don't live a complicated life. Life is too short.

I also found some more information on Katie and her story on Snopes if you'd like to read more.

For other emotional still photos, you can check out the Best of Photojournalism website's Previous Winners, and -- as Jenny's forward ended --

Work as if it was your first day.
Forgive as soon as possible.
Love without boundaries.
Laugh without control
and never stop smiling.

First Family 5K -- Oktoberfest 2009

2009-09-20T23:12:00.007-05:00

In years past, James and I have participated in the Addison Oktoberfest 5K that benefits Wipe Out Kids' Cancer. Not only does it serve a good cause, you run 5K to be greeted by free beer at the end! http://www.oktoberfest5k.com/ It's always been a lot of fun and something I have looked forward to each year. This year, James and I had each set a goal back in the spring to get in enough shape to run the race again. Note: this was pre-pregnancy! But we thought it would still be fun, and Claire would be happy sitting in her stroller for a mere 3.1 miles, right? Ummm ...

The first mile was great. She sat in her stroller watching other people fly by us first in one direction and then the other as folks hit the turnaround (we had started towards the back since we had a stroller and didn't want to get in anyone's way). She looked out for babies and doggies and overall relaxed in her seat.

Second mile was when she wanted to be carried. We alternated between the two of us to carry her in our arms, on our shoulders, or even on my back. We started slowing and more people started passing.

Mile three: Claire wants to walk. By the time we started the 3rd mile, we were officially last of the pack of the entire race. Claire needed to stop to check out flowers, trees, rocks, and the bumps in the road. At least I got in a good cool down!

I can 100% guarantee you that my first 5K during this pregnancy is also my last -- I mean, seriously, what was I thinking?! -- but I'm glad I did it.

Our final time was somewhere over an hour
(not exactly sure how long since we didn't start when the clock was 0)

Post-race snacks and smiles

Baby Pee -- 24-Week Appointment

2009-09-15T12:06:00.002-05:00

The whole thing about "2nd pregancy syndrome" is so true. With the first pregnancy, I could tell you how many weeks (and days) I was pregnant and probably how much longer to go; now I have to stop and think "well, my LAST appointment was Week 20-ish ... and I go to the doctor in another week or so, so I must be around ...". But I feel good, so no complaints here.

Had my 24(ish)-Week appointment today. Gained a little under 4 pounds the last 4 weeks for a total of 5.4 pounds for this pregnancy. JJ (our nickname for "James Jr." until we choose an actual name) is really active and even gave a little kick to the mic today while we were listening to his heartbeat. Dr. J says everything looks great, and she seems to agree with me that this pregancy is going so quickly! There's something about Labor Day triggering this snowball effect for the rest of the year where it's just chock-full of holidays, activities, etc. I also need to sneak in the glucose screening test before my next appointment.

My stomach is definitely well into protrusion at this point, so I thought I'd share this graphic that Syndee sent me when I was first pregnant. Some images really stick with you because of the impact they make, and this is definitely one. I mentioned it as recently as last month when I was talking to Daphne; hopefully this doesn't scare her off too much. I think about this image all the time when people rub my tummy and I wonder if they know that they're rubbing my small intestine. Hehe.

Organs During Pregnancy

Long Winter Ahead?

2009-09-13T12:19:00.002-05:00

Seeing as how we're only three weeks into the new school year and Claire's already on her second cold (complete with low-grade fever and runny nose), I have a feeling it's going to be a LOOOONG winter ahead. Pair that with this whole H1N1 flu thing, I'm definitely not looking forward to it. I guess the good news is that at this rate, Claire will go through the 200+ variations of the rhinovirus at an early age and hopefully be a pretty healthy adult!

From Wikipedia: "An estimated 22 to 189 million school days are missed annually due to a cold. As a result, parents missed 126 million workdays to stay home to care for their children. When added to the 150 million workdays missed by employees suffering from a cold, the total economic impact of cold-related work loss exceeds $20 billion per year."

Studies are in progress on the H1N1 vaccine right now which I have a feeling I'll be getting this year (to be confirmed by my OB this week). Pregnant women are especially high-risk to this strain evidenced by the fact that 6% of the people who have died from H1N1 so far have been pregnant even though pregnant women only make up for 1% of the population. I guess our hormones are already so out of whack, something like the flu is just the straw to that camel's back. Young children are also at the top of the list, but interestingly, there is a segment of the population (40-70? something like that) that doesn't really need to get it because I guess a similar strain passed through during their childhood years that may have built up enough antibodies. My joke was maybe that's the government's way of taking care of the baby boom and social security shortage problem. :) Great, more for the rest of us!

So I'm off to wash my hands yet again as I wait to hear from the government whether it'll be 1 or 2 doses of 15 to 30 ccs, though what I really need to do is stop wiping Claire's snot with my bare hand. Seriously, the things you do as a parent!

Miss Smartypants

2009-09-03T08:42:00.004-05:00

It's so incredible how much Claire is learning right now. I feel like everyday brings on a new word or concept that I didn't realize she knew before. I know I've said this before with just about every stage, but I love this age!

Push-ups. Claire's been doing sit-ups and push-ups with James. Last week, after going out for dinner, we were walking by an outside table and chairs. Claire tried to climb up on the chair and couldn't pull herself up, so she immediately dropped to the ground to do some push-ups (to get stronger?) with no prompting, then tried to pull herself up on the chair again. Cuteness.

Dot. At the same restaurant, there was a mat on the ground with lots of round circles. Claire was going to each dot and hitting it with both her hands and saying "dot!" which I had no idea she knew. The people in the restaurant were quite amused.

Family. Her school is teaching about families right now, and Claire's picked up the concept of the small thing is the baby, the bigger is the mommy, and the third is the daddy. As she reads her books now, she'll point out "baby", "mama", and "dada" animals. She's also starting to relate people to each other. For instance, she knows that Ye-Ye and Nai-Nai go together, as do Po-Po and Gong-Gong ("ngog-ngog" still) and A-Yi (Crystal) and Kirby.

Baby Brother. You can ask her where the baby or her baby brother is, and she immediately turns to pull up my shirt to reveal my tummy. For fun the other day, I had her in my lap and told her that her baby brother kicked her, and she tried to kick him back. Sibling squabbles already? :)

Anniversary Trip / Babymoon - Washington, D.C.

2009-08-19T20:19:00.005-05:00

Happy Anniversary, James!

Since getting married in 2001 -- or actually since we started dating in 1998 -- James and I have always tried to go on a trip to celebrate our anniversary each year. This year, after tossing around ideas for weeks, we finally settled on D.C. for our trip / babymoon (the last big trip before Pee-Nut is here). D.C. one of those cities where you can do a lot or a little, transportation is convenient, and there's the added benefit that we have family there that we don't get to see often enough and could visit. There were only 3 "touristy" things I really wanted to do over the weekend: eat crab, go to the Spy Museum, and take a nap. Everything else would be gravy.

My parents were nice enough to come up from Houston to watch Claire while we were gone. James and I have done one-nighters and multi-night trips by ourselves before now, but this is actually the first multi-night trip James and I have taken together since Claire has been born. I have absolutely no doubts that my parents would take great care of Claire. I think they actually enjoyed having Claire all to themselves, and hopefully I didn't overwhelm them with notes (hey, it was really only one page; the other page was just suggestions of places to go and things to do)! You'll have to check out Claire's blog to see what they ended up doing over the weekend, and since my dad was there, you know there were lots of pictures!

Our trip was Thursday morning through Saturday night, thus giving us a full two and a half days on the ground and two nights of uninterrupted sleep. James surprised me at the airport when we were checking in my upgrading us to First Class, so we got to travel in style on the way to Reagan International.

After we checked in and got situated, we decided to get our bearings of the area before taking the Metro into the 'burbs. We found out that our hotel -- the Grand Hyatt Washington -- was right in the middle of all the things I had in mind. Yay! We walked, munched, bought cupcakes, and headed to the metro. I really like public transportation, so just that alone was an event in itself. When it was time, we headed out to our Aunt and Uncle's house for some CRAB (yay!), dinner, and great conversation with them, Daphne, and Drew. Even after all that crab during dinner -- I think I ate 7 or 8 myself -- James and I still managed to polish off another half-dozen in our hotel room after we got back. Needless to say, we tumbled into a blissful slumber that night.

It's difficult to show you how long, deep,
and steep the escalator was down to the Metro.

On Friday, our one full-day, we did the touristy things after I finally decided wake up and get out of bed. A big hotel breakfast (and a few snacks along the way) was enough to tide us over while we visited the National Museum of Crime and Punishment, see GI Joe (not a great movie but at least I got to see one!), and went through the International Spy Museum. If you haven't done those two museums, I would definitely recommend them; they're definitely not your "typical" museum. I would say the only downside was that the Spy Museum was so busy, we weren't able to do all the exhibits ourselves; it just didn't seem right to push the kids out of the way weasel our way through.

The actual set of "America's Most Wanted".
It's taped at the Crime and Punishment museum!

All walked-out, it was time to NAP! Refreshed, James and I headed to the Lebanese Taverna off Connecticut that came highly recommended from a friend. It was sooooo good and the perfect atmosphere to celebrate our 8-year wedding anniversary. We sat outside to enjoy the not-too-hot weather and to people-watch everyone around us. We ordered tapas over the course of a couple of hours and brought the leftovers with us because we were too reluctant to leave the yummies on the table to be thrown away. Besides, we did eat those crabs back at the hotel room; who knows if we'd be hit with a hummus craving in the middle of the night?

Mmmm ... I don't care if it was the Panda Express of Lebanese food.
Not like I would know, and it was GOOD

We actually ended up eating some of the leftovers Saturday morning as I slowly peeled myself out of bed (late, of course) and got ready to visit Daphne and Drew's place in the 'burbs. Their house is awesome, and they welcomed us with a wonderful meal. James and I enjoyed doing something we're good at (that would be sitting around and chatting) and then got off our butts long enough to walk around the block and check out the houses in the area. So cute, but I do have to say that we're quite spoiled here in Texas with what you get for the money.

At the end of the trip, Uncle David took us back to Reagan where we took our flight home and got back in record time (30 minutes before our scheduled arrival!). We skeddaled home just in time to rile Claire up before bedtime. We were so glad to see her!

We actually found our house while we were descending!
It's right ... well ... there ...

All in all, it was a wonderful weekend, and I'm so glad James and I made the time to go. It was a little odd to be able to get on the plane with so little gear, to go to sleep and wake up when I felt like it, to walk around holding each other's hand instead of having a little one to chase, and to have whole conversations over long meals instead of trying to split our time. Sound familiar for those of you who have kids? :) I'm already looking forward to next year!

The only regret I have about this trip was that I didn't take hardly any pictures! I guess I'm so used to snapping shots of Claire that I didn't know what to do once she wasn't around to be my subject. Luckily, I did remember to get a few pictures of James and I together, which I have noticed I don't have many of at least recently.

Boy, Oh, Boy! -- 20-Week Appointment

2009-08-18T13:29:00.002-05:00

Our Pee-Nut is a boy! We had the sonogram this morning and discovered that our Baby Pee indeed does have a pee-pee. We're super excited at the news, and I was happy to find out that he's growing right on track and looks great. He's measuring 20w 2d (our guess was 20w 5 d which is within the 3-day window they like to see) and his heart rate is 150 (which is right in the middle of the desired 120 to 180). We got to see lots of detail in the sonogram (head, hands, feet, spine, bladder, etc), and he even punched my uterus while we were watching to say hello.

My guess was right after all -- although I did have a 50/50 chance of getting it wrong or right -- but I'm pretty sure I won't have any more opportunities to find out whether every pregnancy really is that different from one another; I'll just have to go with my hypothesis that I felt one way with a girl and another with a boy. :)

As for me, I gained three pounds from my last appointment, but I'm only up 1 pound during this pregnancy. My vitals are good, and I'm feeling good. Dr. Jaffee says she's happy with my weight gain (or lack thereof) so far and there's not really much we can do about my right hip that's already starting to ache (I have to knock it when I stand up so that I can walk) except to try and sleep on my left-side more to take the weight off of it.

There is definitely no disguising the pregnancy at this point, but I'm also not wanting to. James has noticed that I'm wearing more "I'm pregnant" clothes this pregnancy versus my "hide the belly" clothes last one; lucky someone should call dibs on all the Japanese Weekend clothes I got this time around! James spoke up during the appointment to ask about my protein intake -- I don't eat much meat -- and Dr. Jaffee says that I should try and work in some type of protein at every meal but that dairy (including cheese, yogurt, and milk) count as my protein citing that lots of vegetarians have very healthy babies. Yum, cheese!

I'll post sonogram pictures, and I also owe an update on our Anniversary Trip / Babymoon in DC, so check back soon!

My Guess Is ...

2009-08-16T13:01:00.003-05:00

On Tuesday, I have my halfway-there appointment where -- among other things -- we get to see if Baby Pee is a little boy or little girl (assuming s/he behaves nicely). Lots of folks have asked me for my guess, so I figure I'll put it down before I actually find out for sure.

My guess right now? A boy. Why? Because this pregnancy seems so different from my first. Of course, as James says, every pregnancy is different, so it's hard to say; but since I've only had one other pregnancy and it's been different than this one, I'll go with the opposite of what I already have. Besides, it's a 50/50 shot, right?

Reasons ... it's not much but it's all I really have to go on ...

Morning Sickness

Pregnancy 1: I was constantly nauseated during my first 12-14 weeks with #1 but was able to do a quick vomit and feel great for the rest of the day. It would start with waking slowly, creeping one eye open, feeling for the crackers next to my bed, and nibbling until the rocking boat settled down. Then nothing after that first trimester.
Pregnancy 2: I felt pretty good for the most part with some nausea but nothing strong. NO vomiting at all until Week 13 ... and then a WHOLE WEEK'S worth all at once 24/7. Even now, the slightest thing might trigger my gag reflex, though I have been saved from any more vomiting since that terrible Week 13.

Skin

Pregnancy 1: My skin with my first was AWFUL. Every day was another blemish, bump, pimple, breakout, zit to contend with. People would actually feel bad for me and say things like "don't worry; it will clear up after you have the baby, and you can take care of it then".
Pregnancy 2: While I wouldn't say my skin is great (it never has been), it's at least not as bad as it was the first time. I can't say that it's glowing and smooth, but it's definitely not any worse than any normal point in my life.

Body

Pregnancy 1: I expanded in every which direction last time. It was a serious spreading and swelling of the whole body to where, until the end, it looked like I was getting slowly fatter and smushed, less belly.
Pregnancy 2: At least so far, it's been more belly than the rest of my body. Of course, it's early yet, but I'm hoping the trend will continue for the remainder of the pregnancy.

Overall, I have to say the second pregnancy is a lot different than the first in that I don't worry as much and can enjoy it more. During my first pregnancy, there are fears and worrying and thinking plus feeling out of control and just sort of ugly (I did!). This time around, I'm so busy with Claire and work and life that I'll sometimes forget that I'm even pregnant for a moment. Unless I have a dr appointment that week, I probably can't tell you what week I'm in, and I definitely don't have the time to spend reading baby books all the time.

So, my guess is a boy. I guess I'll find out in a couple of days if I'm right or not. People have asked which one I want more, and I'm going to be ecstatic no matter what. If it's a girl, having the two babies close together will be hard but rewarding, and I'll be able to re-use everything Claire had. If it's a boy, we'll have the "one of each" balance and it might alleviate some of the sibling rivalry that will come later in life. Either way, I'm just crossing my fingers in hopes that I have a happy, healthy baby and can't wait to greet him or her in a few months!

She Does Look Like Me!

2009-08-13T23:37:00.003-05:00

My brother Zong just got back from a whirlwind trip to Asia including an extended visit to family in Taiwan. While he was there, he was thoughtful enough to get some pictures from "back when" including the one below of me circa 1978. This is the first picture (or moment, really), that I was like "omigosh, maybe Claire DOES look like me!". Of course, I'm sleeping, but what the heck. The sprawled position, the foot propped up (Whoops. I guess that crazy foot of hers is from my side after all) ... I actually did a double-take. I tried to find a recent picture of Claire sleeping since it's more obvious now but couldn't find one, however here's one from last year that's sort of similar. And if it's not, don't tell me and burst my bubble! :D

Me, circa 1978. Check out that wire crib!

Claire @ 7-ish months

Girls Trip - Miami, FL

2009-08-04T14:42:00.009-05:00

One of my most favorite traditions is my girls trip in which some of my best gal pals and I head to a destination for some R&R. Last weekend, I headed to Miami, FL with Debbie and Syndee. I quickly discovered that Miami is an incredible city. Even stepping off the plane put me in a different world with lots of languages surrounding me, luggage wrapping (which I haven't seen since flying internationally), and lots of beautiful people.

Ready to hit the beach

Miami Beach itself has a totally different vibe than anywhere I've ever been. If you stroll down Ocean Drive at night, you'll pass 20 or 30 tiny hotels that each boast a huge porch and lobbby ... and a tiny check-in desk. The lobbies are actually bars and the porches and sidewalks restaurants -- this is EVERY hotel! So you feel as though you're going from party to party as you go down the street. People watching is incredble as you see families (babies out at 12:30 at night), hoochies, rich people, etc all mingling together. I've also never been to anywhere before where there were so many tall, skinny people showing so much leg. I never really thought of myself as a leg girl, but there were certainly a lot of them to look at in Miami!

Too bad it was so humid when we took this picture

The restaurant scene is something else, as well. We went out to eat both nights around midnight, and you would not have known that it wasn't a normal 8pm seating time. People filled the streets, the tables were full, and getting seated was as normal then as it was 4 hours prior and 4 hours later (lots of places stopped seating -- not serving, though -- between 2am and 4am). In the morning, it was a totally different Miami than the nighttime. This is when the families come out (while all the party-ers slept, I guess) and shop or go to the beach. I think the best way to enjoy the city would be to take up the siesta ... eat, sleep, party, sleep, play, sleep. My kind of place!

Fried seafood recommended by Guy on the Food channel.

Fried lobster, fried oyesters, fried fish, fried roe, and tres leches ... Yum!

We spent the weekend shopping on Lincoln Road and Collins, resting by the ocean and in our room, and eating Italian, fried seafood, sushi (cooked for me, of course), tapas, etc. We were able to hit the beach for a little while and went to the Vizcaya museum, but the main thing was that I was able to spend some time with the girls that keep me sane and gave me time to recharge and remember who I am and what I'm grateful for ... two things I tend to forget when I get caught up in the day-to-day grind. One of the things I'm especially grateful for is that James is okay with these weekend jaunts because I hope to never give them up!

It would have been a more accurate picture if it showed me hugging my girls fiercely never wanting to let go. That's how I felt!

In other travel news, I got back from a business trip in Portland the day before I left for Miami. It was 105 in Portland! I was so glad that we chose to go to Miami for my Girls Trip instead of Seattle - where we were originally headed - because I would have been quite disappointed to pay upwards of $600 to fly to the PNW to find it over a hundred degrees all weekend! It's a never-before-seen hot spell there that I'm glad I didn't stick around for much longer than the 3 days for my work. Pee-Nut should be getting frequent flyer miles for all this traveling!

Baby Pee - 16-Week Appt

2009-07-16T10:13:00.002-05:00

Just got back from Dr. Jaffee's for my 16-week appointment, and everything looks good. I haven't gained any weight yet (not sure if it's the lack of appetite or chasing around the toddler, but I'll take it) and my blood pressure is nice and low. Baby's heartbeat is strong and steady (150 bpm), and everything seems on track size-wise (based on the size of my uterus, I think). I was happy to tell her, yes, I've felt the baby flutter (last Friday) and look forward to feeling Baby move even more. Next symptoms I should be expecting between now and my next visit is round ligament pain, which I've already been having if I cough while laying on my side.

I think it's the "second baby syndrome" but the appointments seem to be freakishly short. Not because Dr. Jaffee isn't taking care of me, because she is, but because I don't have questions or concerns. I just go in there, get her caught up on any random things (ie the week of vomiting last month), and then we do the routine things before I'm outta there. 15 minutes tops. With Claire, I remember coming with lists in hand filled with question after question. Definitely a lot less anxiety this time around.

Next appointment is Tuesday, Aug 18th since both Dr. Jaffee and I will be out of town four weeks from today when my appointment shoud have been. The exciting thing is that, at the next appointment, we find out if it's a boy or girl!

People ask which one we want, and honestly it doesn't matter. A girl would be nice so that we can re-use everything we already have ... plus I know how to raise a girl! But then a boy would be nice for the balance, the lack of competition, and so James can have someone do "boy" things while I'm off doing "girl" things. Either way, I'm just wanted a happy, healthy baby!

The Fourth Madness (Floods and Phantom Fever)

2009-07-10T06:22:00.007-05:00

What a crazy Fourth of July weekend. There were the good things: all four grandparents in town, lots of yummy food, an extra day off work ... and then the bad: leak in the wall, torn up carpet, and Claire's phantom fever coming back.

The leak is one of those dumb builder stories, really. Apparently when the builders were putting in the picture frame moulding in our formal living room, they nailed one of the sections to a copper pipe in the wall, so we've been slowly leaking water for a year and a half. On Friday, I guess the water finally corroded the nail/pipe enough that it started spewing water, thus soaking the drywall and the floor. The builder agreed to take care of it (after all, it WAS their fault), but we did have the headache of having to turn off our water to the whole house, plus Claire's playroom has been disbanded and scattered throughout the house! Next week, they're going to send someone out to clean the carpet, replace the pad, clean the insides of the wall, replace the drywall, texture, paint, and re-mould.

On the phantom fever, a week before the 4th weekend, Claire woke up with a fever so I stayed home with her. The fever ran through all of Friday, all of Saturday, and into Sunday morning, during which Claire was cranky, clingy, and all-around grumpy. Plus, it caused us to miss StrollerFit (now that I'm feeling well enough to go again!), swimming, AND Evan's birthday party! Not to mention the fact that it never even manifested into anything ... just a fever that hovered between 99 and 101 for 48 hours.

So, this Friday (yes, exactly one week later) it happened again! Claire woke with a fever, but luckily both James and I had the day off from work so that I didn't have to try and work around meetings and such. Of course, we canceled our plans to attend the Castle Hills parade, BBQ, and fireworks and nursed the baby all day. Luckily, that night, the fireworks happened to be set off practically in our front lawn, so we were able to enjoy that after the sun went down.

The fever burned between 99 and 101-ish (underarm, which means it was probably even higher) from Friday morning through Saturday, so finally we decided to take her to the Acute Kids to see if there was anything obvious that should be addressed. I would have hated to have her in pain for something dumb like an ear infection or strep even if she wasn't showing symptoms.

Acute Kids -- which I LOVE, btw -- said that her ears, nose, and throat all looked great. They did think that perhaps the reason the fever didn't go down is because we might not be dosing Claire enough. Since Claire wasn't yet 2 or 24 lbs, it said "ask your doctor", so I'd been doing 0.8 of the Infant Tylenol since that's what the doctor had prescribed before during the well-baby visits. The Acute Kids doctor suggested we try 1 tsp of Tylenol alternating with 1 tsp of Motrin every three hours. Other than that, there was nothing obviously wrong with Claire and to watch her to make sure it didn't escalate. The doc did ask if Claire was a daycare baby because she had seen a few cases of daycare babies coming in with no other symptoms. *shrug* She also said that it probably wasn't teething because teething wouldn't result in a fever higher than a 101 which Claire was when we went into Acute Kids.

We started that regimine on Saturday afternoon and continued it through Sunday night. Not sure how well it was working, though, because the fever at one point overnight was 103 (she was glowing heat from her whole body) and then finally extinguished after one last 4am dose Monday in the wee hours of the morning.

Claire went to school on Monday, and they said she was okay. On Tuesday when I picked her up (having been fever-free for two days now), I noticed her torso was a little mottled. Not a rash, exactly, just kind of speckled, but nothing else was wrong. Of course, tons of things ran through my head (ie "is she getting enough oxygen?! Maybe she's air-starved!"), and James did a very good Google to find Roseola. Of course, we quickly self-diagnosed and called it true. :) All of the symptoms were the certainly the same.

The sites that we read said that Roseola is contagious prior to any symptoms actually appearing (a fever, in our case), so there's no reason not to send her to school. The mottled thing lasted another day or so, during which the school noted that Claire was exceptionally quiet and didn't want to play with other kids (she would actually make it a point to play by herself). Thursday I picked her up, and she was a lot better, and this morning (Friday, 7/10), she seems back to her normal self. Whew!

And Then There Were 2

2009-06-30T20:11:00.001-05:00

Okay, maybe I should say "1.3" with "2" coming sometime late this year or early next year. James and I finally decided to settle the "will we or won't we" debate by finding out (surprise!) that we will. My official due date is Jan 3, 2010 but Claire was about 2 weeks early, so I'm hoping #2 will be, too. It would be great to sock it to the IRS. ;)

With Claire, I found out I was pregnant with our Sweet Pee on Father's Day 2007. With this Pee-Nut, I found out just before Mother's Day this year. I have to say that James and I went through various emotional stages -- think shock, denial -- before settling on excitement and happiness.

I laugh as I finish this posting because I had originally written this:

So far, the pregnancy hasn't been too bad. I'm proud to say that, although I've had morning sickness pretty much the whole first trimester ("morning" sickness is such a misnomer!), I have yet to actually throw up. Oddly enough, I've had a lot of heartburn, but it's nothing Tums can't knock out.

Yeah. No sooner than I had typed that little ditty, I ended up with my head in the toilet for about a week. Those of you with delicate stomachs, I'd stop reading now. It started on Monday, 6/22 with me being nauseated from the moment I woke up. The rolling continued as I drove to work and finally manifested as I drove past freshly cut grass right by the parking garage. Luckily, I had a bag of animal crackers right beside me ... needless to say, those were thrown out, and I will never look at animal crackers the same.

Fast forward 2 hours by which time I had spent the entire morning in the women's restroom (well, trying to leave but immediately having to turn back around) and apologizing curses to anyone that walked in. And so ended my indecision on when to tell folks at my office. I let my boss and secretary know and headed home. Hey, if I'm going to spend that much time hugging a toilet, it might as well be mine! The rest of the week wasn't much better with me mostly eating a couple of crackers and other bland, starchy foods.

But, one week after it started, it stopped. I woke up Monday morning and, after slowly cracking one eye opened, realized I felt fine! Woo-hoo! Not wanting to jinx it, I gave it another day before declaring victory. Now hopefully I can enjoy the next few weeks ... until I start complaining during the last trimester again. :)

So, that's that! Guess Claire's not going to be an only child after all. No decisions have been made yet; I figure we'll find out if it's a boy or girl first (mid-August) and then start deciding things ... or just play it by ear. I mean, we're pros by now, right? ;)

Girl Time

2009-06-18T09:55:00.000-05:00

I was lucky enough to go the Rascal Flatts concert with Corrie, and I had an absolute blast. It's not often I get to spend quality time (ie not wrangling a toddler at a restaurant begging her to sit down or having to watch the clock so that I'm not gone for too long) with one of my best girlfriends, so it was a real treat to enjoy a leisurely dinner, lounge in the grass on a blanket during a surprisingly cool summer evening, listen to a good concert (Darius Rucker ... yes, HOOTIE! ... was the opening act ... very exciting), and chit chat for hours about nothing and everything.

To all my girlfriends (you know who you are), you're the best. You make me laugh, you keep me sane, and you assure me that I'm not alone. Plus, I'm glad all of you are forgiving and willing to still love me even though I don't see you often or call you enough. I can guarantee that you're in my thoughts and, whenever we are together, I always feel as though we pick up as though we've never been apart.

Why God Made Moms

2009-04-03T09:23:00.001-05:00

I'm a little bit drowing right now, and Kim was nice enough to point out that I haven't kept up my blog (actually, I wrote something and never published, so I threw that one up there just now, too), so here's a quick funny that Haley sent. Enjoy!

Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house
3. To help us out when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms & dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3 Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic; they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3 I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

On the Road Again

2009-03-15T22:33:00.005-05:00

Just got back from another business trip to the Pacific Northwest. For this trip, I left early on Monday and got back Friday afternoon. To help James out while I was gone, his parents came into town so that Claire could stay home during the day. I used to think that traveling when Claire was really young was awful because she might forget me while I was gone. Now I've discovered that being gone at this age was even worse!

When I walked in on Friday, Bunny III (our Roomba) was running so no one heard me come in. I came into the living room and Claire toddled from the other room. I SWEAR she grew bigger during the four and a half days I was gone.

She stared at me. I held my breath.

I knelt there as she toddled over to me tentatively, put one hand on my shoulder, and rested her head on my shoulder. This reaction was much different than the exuberant launching I had been dreaming of as I raced back home from the airport! She raised her head and looked at me in the face bringing our eyes together real close, then laid her head back down again on my shoulder and gave me a hug. My heart squeezed.

But no big smiles quite yet. This girl was going to make me WORK for it ... which I deserved, of course, for leaving her for almost a week. The rest of the afternoon, I paid my dues and groveled for her forgiveness.

Luckily, sleeping is still a great reset button, and she was back to her old self again the next morning ... but that look on her face when she stared in my eyes still haunts me. I'm sorry for leaving, my baby!

1943 Guide to Hiring Women

2009-02-27T16:57:00.003-06:00

Kim sent me this today, and it made me laugh. While I might fall under cantankerous and fussy, I think I resonate more with being a “husky” girl. Hehe. Love it.

(click on the image to read it better)

Thanks for the laughs, Kim!

Feel Good Video -- Worth the Watch!

2009-02-25T21:52:00.011-06:00

Found this video on YouTube, and I fell in love. It's so feel good and happy and just makes me smile. I'm definitely adding this one to my Links I Like (plus the cool stop motion one Nina sent me). Please watch it ... it will make your day!

I recommend watching it in HD (select the lil' arrow right here ↑↑)

Blurb Addict

2009-02-16T00:06:00.006-06:00

Another book done (my third). This one was the easiest by far because I just "slurped" my blog, and the software did all the rest. There was some formatting to be done to make things fit right, but I did my 52 entries -- 52 entries in 52 weeks, but not one every week -- and 30-some-odd pictures in about 2 hours. One thing that was really nice about the software is that it lets you choose what entries to download, so as long as Blogger plays nice and doesn't change its API next year, I'll be doing that for Claire's blog instead of spending the 2+ months doing it all manually!

http://waysqua...

2008

By Way-Way Pee

Book Preview

My "bookstore" -- http://blurb.com/user/waysquared

Straw. Camel.

2009-01-30T08:14:00.002-06:00

Ack.

Never Ceases to Amaze

2009-01-15T23:45:00.000-06:00

I may have already said it (I think it all the time), but it never ceases to amaze me how much Claire seems to learn and grow every day. Besides just the walking that's becoming more and more confident, I realized this week that she actually understands a lot of the things I'm saying. I think it first sunk in when my family was here and we would ask her where Kirby (the dog) was. She would instantly look around for her and even point at the stairs if she knew Kirby had gone upstairs. Other examples are the everyday commands she reacts to when prompted: "please sit down" - a la the bathtub, "ahhhhh" - meaning open your mouth and let me see what you just put inside, "look up" - super useful when washing her hair, and "put your head down" - nice when we're putting her to bed. :)

There are other funny "tricks" that she's picked up recently. She definitely knows "aye, aye, cap'n" (she salutes), "high five" (self explanatory, I think), and "hungry" (single finger in the mouth). James was trying to teach her to "punch it in" this morning; we'll see when that one sticks.

Tonight she was even identifying various body parts (well, the nose and the ear) and is starting to get curious about the bellybutton which I'm pretty sure is from that book they're reading at school. I know there's more, but that's all I've got off the top of my head.

She shows her sensitivity by instantly reacting to inflections in my voice. When I ask what happened to her sock, she'll touch her bare foot; when I ask for her to put on her jacket, she'll extend an arm; when I tell her no sternly enough, she immediately throws herself forward and does a dramatic wail (Diana's seen it; she thought it was hilarious). Yeah, this one's going to be a handful. :)

One bad habit that she had picked up was biting my shoulder (and sometimes not really wanting to let go immediately). It wasn't for attention because I'm usually carrying her at the time or in aggression because it's usually in a good mood ... I honestly think she was just super excited and needed to emote. Luckily, I think I broke her of that one within a week. And she knows when she's not supposed to do something (like bite my shoulder) because she'll start going towards it and suddenly start shaking her head instead. I just have to make sure I don't laugh else she takes it as a sign to go ahead!

I keep saying this at each milestone, but I love this age. What an amazing period she's going through, and how fun! I can't wait to get home every day to check to make sure she still remembers everything from the day before and to see whether she picked up something new. She has such a love of life and never ceases to explore everything around her to the nth degree. Sure, that may mean sometimes that she stays awake easily for 10 hours at a time (I'm not joking; today was another example), but it's all a trade-off, right?

I'm Working On It!

2008-12-21T17:16:00.004-06:00

I know, I know ... it's been weeks since I last posted! And, yes, I'm talking more about Claire's blog than mine since hers is the one with pictures. I guess things have just been busy around here. My company's also being impacted by all the mess going on with the economy. When no one spends money, no one needs goods shipped. So there's that. We've had a couple of holiday parties, accidently missed a couple of parties (I swear, we've been busy), and been lucky enough to see some long-missed friends.

Then, Claire was sick a couple of weeks ago. When I took her into the doctor, he prescribed her breathing treatments which meant that we had to somehow get a fiesty 10 month old to sit still and breathe in Albuterol from a nebulizer three times a day. Needless to say, Claire got to watch a lot of TV that week. She's much better now and switched over to the liquid Albuterol.

*** I have a story here that I should probably insert, but I'll write about it another time. But you can ask me about it ... just use the keyword "nosebleed". [shudder] ***

As for Claire, she's growing more every day. She's babbling a ton, and I SWEAR that she said "duck" and used it correctly at least once. She knows commands like "up" - which is very useful when washing her hair! - and is taking baths is the grown-up tub now. She has fun activities like the blinking game where you can take turns blinking back and forth with her for minutes at a time. One of my favorite things is that she waves "Hi" and "Bye-bye" and will do it anytime she hears either even if on TV or from a toy!

I can see her imagination starting to blossom as I watch her playing by herself and talking to the objects around her. She likes to take two similar objects in each hand and knock them against each other, and one very useful interest right now is her liking to put things into containers ... helps with the picking up at night. :) She's starting to recognize the similarities between people. Not sure how to explain that, but an example is if I have something in my hair, she'll touch her own head to find an equivalent item. Or she'll touch my nose and then touch her own.

Her eating habits are crazy as usual. She somehow learned that when she's done or doesn't want something, she just tosses it over the side of her tray so that she no longer has to deal with it. This week, she's also decided that behind her ear is a good place for things she doesn't want (I have no idea why). Unfortunately, she's also become a pickier eater recently ... she knows what she likes, and she knows what she doesn't like. It has been fun, however, testing out her tastebuds with all sorts of foods. She's also pretty sure that she's going to feed herself instead of you feeding her most of the time, so we go through lots of bibs and usually head straight to the bathtub after a meal.

No, she's still not walking on her own yet, but I'm okay with that. I am in no need to have a show-off baby ... a happy, healthy one is good enough for me! Mostly she holds our fingers, furniture surfs, or pushes items around the room to get around. She definitely knows where she wants to go though, so there's no much question that she's the one driving you from place to place!

I figure there's no huge need to get Claire a lot of gifts for Christmas this year, but I am thinking about giving her some bags with tissue paper to open since she's enjoying that immensely right now. I'm hoping to institute a 2 gift rule for her ... one from us and one from Santa. We'll see how that goes.

James and I are staying in Dallas instead of going anywhere these next couple of weeks. I'm out of vacation days after using them up during my maternity leave, and we already went to Aspen this year for my parents' family vacation. My whole family is coming up over New Years and to celebrate my dad's birthday, so I'll get to see everyone then. I thought his parents would come up for Christmas since I'm sure they'll be busy once Baby James (George's baby) is due soon, but it looks like it's just us three for Christmas. We've decided that we're going to start a few Christmas traditions on our own, so it'll be hot pot, a holiday-themed movie, and gift opening on Christmas Eve, then a big country breakfast and Santa's gift on Christmas Day. Not a bad plan, if you ask me.

Okay, so there's the big update. And while I was typing this update, I was also working on sorting all the pictures and videos from this month, so look for those on Claire's site shortly!

Sleeping Problems Demystified

2008-11-30T22:15:00.001-06:00

Well, apparently Claire's recent sleeping problems is supposed to happen. I had to google the heck out of "problems sleeping at nine months" and hundreds of variations to figure out what the heck is going on. The changes is sleeping patterns could be a couple of things (and I have a feeling we got a double-whammy): separation anxiety and pre-walking. Fabulous.

Separation anxiety happens after a child learns about object permanence (oh, you still exist even though I can't see you) and suddenly realizes that Mom and Dad are out there somewhere WITHOUT THE BABY! With Claire, oftentimes she's okay, but as soon as she realizes I've left the room, I'm stuck carrying her for the next hour or so after I come back in because she doesn't want to chance me leaving her again. It's weird though because she'll get distracted and then be fine if I'm not around she's fine until she sees me again and remembers that she was upset that I left. So there's that.

Then, apparently there's another milestone in which babies mess up their otherwise pretty good sleeping habits, and that's when they're getting ready to walk. What I've read says that they're so focused on putting together the new movement patterns they're learning that they're not able to turn off their excitement at night and will probably wake every 3 to 4 hours to practice (which usually includes standing in their cribs holding onto the side and wailing). Sums up Claire pretty well, except add "mamamamama babababababa mamamamama dadadadadada!!!!" to that wailing. Nothing like it, especially at 1 and 4 and 5 and 6 in the morning. So what's the timing of THAT being resolved? After she's taken her first steps per my research. Needless to say, I tried to get her to practice walking a lot this weekend after I read that ... but with the separation anxiety, it was hard to pry her off my hip long enough to even get her to try and stand!

This too shall pass. :) I know it sounds like I'm complaining, but I'm really not. I'm in awe and wonder of the amazing transformations and growth in my baby. I know what I'm going through just watching it all happen; for her, it must be overwhelming! A few sleepless nights and less personal time is worth it for a happy, healthy baby.

P.S. A random tidbit for you as long as we're talking about sleeping. I've reverted back to the early days of sleep deprivation where I'll semi-wake in the middle of the night to make sure the baby isn't in the bed with us. Seriously. This first happened the first month -- before Claire ever even got in our bed -- when I was so sleep-deprived, disoriented, and brain-dead that I woke just certain that I carried our newborn into bed with us. Well, apparently I'm doing it again where I'll wake up to make sure Claire's situated safely in the bed ... but she's not there. Weird, right? At least it's just a "is the baby okay?" and a gentle rustling rather than the crazy freak-out like it was that first time, and it's not coupled with a James-sized freak-out to match and intensify the moment anymore, either! :D I've also figured out that I don't remotely do this at all when I'm actually IN the bed with her. Maybe the baby monitor is too close to my ear or something to where I can hear her too well. I dunno. I'm sure James thinks I'm a total weirdo, but I know he's also getting used to it and handles the situation to get me coherent pretty quickly. Oh, and I also don't really remember it in the morning (it just blends in with my other dreams), but James is quick to remind me each and every morning what a looney I am. Thanks, honey.

P.P.S. For those of you offering to help watch the baby so that I can sleep, it's not all her; it's me, too. During the crazy work hours weeks, I was pushing myself too hard. Plus, apparently my body hasn't forgetten my old habits of wanting to stay up late, yet it somehow learned to auto-wake too early. So I appreciate your offers, but I'm okay. Feel free to come over and help Claire practice walking, though. ;)

Miss Independent

2008-11-26T22:19:00.003-06:00

It's crazy how every day it seems like Claire does something new and grows up a little more right before my eyes. In an effort to assert herself, she has recently decided that she is tired of taking bottles and us feeding her; she prefers to feed herself and usually prefers whatever we're eating on the table instead of jar food (can't blame her, really). She also babbles to herself when she's eating; I think she picked that up from watching her dad and I. Luckily, we passed that 9-month milestone with the whole wheat thing, so the world is wide open for her except for the main allergens: shellfish, egg whites, milk, and nuts. I'm also grateful that she's not a picky eater and seems to love all new foods. I hope she keeps that up!

You can just tell no good will come of this

Oddly enough, the school still reports that she eats her food and drinks her bottles (she's finally up to 8oz), so it's just at home that she thinks she's Miss Independent. I'm considering having the school also feed her from their menu (save some money!), but I'm not convinced yet ... it seems like their fare is so sugary and full of sodium and nitrates. Not exactly what I want to be feeding my babydoll quite yet. At least the jar foods are organic and not full of preservatives even if I'm not Martha Stewart enough to make it myself.

She's so proud of herself, you can't help but laugh

Claire's also crawling like a madwoman and pulling up on everything. She'll actually stand on her own for a second or two when she forgets to hold on to something, but so far it's purely accidental. One of the most fun things is that she now dances whenever she hears music. Sometimes it's a little sway from side to side, sometimes we get a head bop, and other times it's an all out full-body wiggle-wiggle. She's waving bye-bye to things and people, and she shakes her head no when she doesn't want something. She's slowly learning the nod as well, and I'm trying to teach her gongxi-gongxi (hands together thanking).

Probably foraging for more food. She likes to harvest her dropped food after the meal.

The last few days, her sleeping has seemed to gone awry. Even as I type right now, I'm listening to her cry it out yet again. :( Not sure what's up, but the girl has been waking at 12:30am (but sometimes puts herself back down) and then again about 4:30am. The 4:30 is the killer because that's when she stands up in the crib, holds onto the side, and just bawls until you get her ... which she then proceeds to want to play (which I do NOT indulge or at least make her do it by herself in the dark) for an hour or two before falling back asleep (usually with me on the couch or in a bed). The last two days, the falling back asleep was until 8 or 9 in the morning! Luckily it was flexible enough at James' work this week that he could wait until she woke, but I have a feeling we need to get her back on track pretty soon. I blame it on teething (I try to blame everything on teething .. hehe).

The roll is almost bigger than her head!

James and I are staying in Dallas this year for Thanksgiving, and all of our families are staying in their respective cities as well. We just happened to all see each other during November somehow, so I guess the urgency isn't strotng enough to deal with the traffic. My parents plan on coming to Dallas over New Year's before they head to Taiwan for Chinese New Year, and we'll see his family in a few weeks in Austin when George's baby is born. Instead, James and I are hosting an "Orphans' Thanksgiving" for all the folks who can't be with their families this holiday weekend. Food, drinks, and football ... sounds like a great combination!

Just a slight drinking problem

Surfacing for Air

2008-11-15T00:30:00.003-06:00

It's been a little insane lately, mostly with work. Between SOX testing, yearly audits, 3rd Party pressures, CSI, and the economy (and the inevitable organizational impacts), I've been totally swamped. It wasn't until today though that I realized it was a little out of control and it's time to take my life back.

For the last month or so, I've been working my normal 8.5 hours during the day, coming home to have dinner, play a little while, put Claire down, and then would hop back online for another 3 hours to get more done. Wash, rinse, repeat. Hence why I haven't been able to post on her blog. I used to do updates in the evenings while watching TV or relaxing, but that time no longer existed. Other things that went away was time to check everyone else's blogs, time with friends, time with James, and time for myself.

This week, though, I realized that I can't continue like that much longer. It hit me while I was on a business trip, away from home, and missing family. Even when I had the chance to go to bed early, sleep without interruption, and do whatever I wanted without having to worry about others, I found myself working long hours, staying up to deal with work, and getting up early to do even more. Not a good way of balancing my life!

It was even worse that James got sick early in the week while watching Claire. Luckily his parents were able to drive into town to help out, but it just killed me knowing that there was so much sacrifice going on just to bring in my paycheck. >:(

So, today, I took my life back ... or at least one sliver. I sorted through pictures, posted on Claire's blog, and didn't check my work email all the while. Woo-hoo for me!

Diaper Rash

2008-11-01T22:16:00.002-05:00

I'll bet you thought I was going to write about Halloween and how incredibly cute Claire was (and I will ... and she was), but I first need to document Claire's first diaper rash.

It's awful. :( On Wednesday when she got home, I noticed that she made a poop so I went to change her. Her bum and surrounding area was all red, splotchy, and sensitive (based on her whimpers as I tried to change her). Heartbreaking!

I'm not sure what caused it (well, my guess is it's the runny poop ... which my guess is caused by the ill decision on our part to give her plums and oatmeal after a couple of days of pellety poop), so I'm not changing anything about her diet -- except no more plums. I also put the jar of spinach way back in the pantry so that we don't accidently pull that one out.

We've been slathering diaper cream all over the area after every changing - Desitin, Boudreaux's Butt Paste, and even Dr. Smith's (the stuff that they keep behind the pharmacist's counter for some reason -- does that make it truly OVER the counter?) - and have been trying to give her nekkid butt time. No accidents until today when she decided to straddle my foot and give it a nice wash. You can tell I've quite evolved as I just let her finish, as to not startle her, and get James to come clean it up. Having learned from that event, I decided to faux-cloth diaper her, though that may slow the flow, however it doesn't stop it altogether. I think I'm missing something in the cloth diapering step-by-step process.

It's getting better; it's just awful to experience. People at work are amazed that she's made it to 9 months without a rash until now. I would have been happy to make it 9 (or 19 or 9 million) more!

The fun stuff (ie Halloween with LOTS of pictures) will be posted on Claire's site shortly.

OBX Trip Report Card

2008-10-23T23:00:00.004-05:00

Claire's grades for the trip:

DFW to ORF/OBX trip: A-

Sleeping at Corolla Beachhouse: C-

Behavior: A (not counting the weird separation anxiety moments)

Eating: A- (she really is a good eater even though it pains me how much formula we throw away)

Sleeping at Nags Head Beachhouse: B (if you don't count the throw-up incident)

ORF to DFW flight: C

Cuteness: A+!

We had a fabulous time in North Carolina. It was wonderful to see all of the Pee family which we just don't do often enough, and going to bless a wedding between two awesome people made it even that much more special. Daphne's such an incredible person with a huge heart, strong convictions, and palpable loyalty ... oh, and killer calves ... hehe. She's totally someone I would want to be friends with even if I weren't related to her by marriage. And for her to find someone like Drew-(Pee) who is unmatchable in wit and random trivia and oozes love and affection for his new bride, I know there are many years of happiness and laughter ahead.

I may have said this before, but it's interesting that - since I've had Claire - when I see weddings, I think less of myself and more of what it will be to see my little girl all growed up and getting married off to someone else. Weird, right? So when I see a Daddy/Daughter dance, I may recollect my own with my Daddy, but tears will spring when I think about James dancing with Claire like that one day. Cheesey.

A special "Yay!" for people who do destination weddings (and invite us to attend!). Besides my own, we've gone to Syndee/Danny's (cruise/Mexico), Tim/Tenny's (California), Nina/Giang's (Costa Rica), and now Daphne/Drew's (Outer Banks) destination weddings together, and what I've discovered is that the weddings are even more enjoyable because you're relaxed on vacation and not worried about having to hurry back to anything immediately. It's just you, them, and tons of new memories. So, big time hint to you folks who have yet to tie the knot ... hint, hint, hint!

And I leave you with a little something that I provided to Daphne for her wedding. She had solicited words of wisdom from her guests on "what is love" and "what is marriage" to share during the ceremony. While mine may not be wisdom, per se, they're at least words (and some were even used!):

"Love is..." –

undeniable

taking each day to discover what more you can give rather than what else you can get … and being happy to do it

willingly changing your last name to “Pee” because you want to share everything with the one you love :)

a fire that must constantly be fed by supporting words, frequent hugs and kisses, and memories created together

"Marriage is..." –

a commitment to actively show one another how much you love each other

a union with your favorite travel companion, heat pump on cold nights, dinner date, partner in crime, and best friend

entering the toughest and darkest of times arm-in-arm and emerging possibly charred, scarred, battered, and broken but clasping tightly hand-in-hand

how you get your parents to stop worrying that you’re living in sin with a boy!

Snotty-nosed Mom!

2008-10-06T17:41:00.003-05:00

It's official. Claire's cooties are way stronger than my antibodies. Whatever she had on Friday - that I'm glad I had her stay home for - decided to latch on to me. On Saturday, my throat hurt, I had a low-grade fever, and I was just generally miserable. Yesterday, I had the body aches, hot flashes, shivers, couldn't sleep, swollen glands, the works! I even felt like I was suffocating when I was lying down because my throat was so constricted.

On Sunday, since Claire sounded so badly and we weren't sure whether to take her to daycare (worried about contagious-ness; see? look how considerate we are!), we decided to take her to the Acute Kids Urgent Care -- after the Cowboys game, of course. The doctor put her on another round of antibiotics, the same as last time but stronger. Something about a wider spectrum. When the doctor asked whether there was anything else I wanted, I asked if he could take a look at my throat. He took a peek and said, "yours looks more red than Claire's! You should see a doctor."

So I did. And I have strep throat. Blech. I asked the doctor when I would be better, and he said that I should be better within the next couple of days. When I asked about the contagious-ness, he said that it's 24-hours (but I forgot to ask from when!?). Of course, I also asked about whether I was going to get Claire and James sick. He asked what antibiotics Claire was taking, I told him, and he said that it was actually the same one he just prescribed me, so she should be fine. I told him that James will probably be in tomorrow, and that was that!

I'm probably headed back to work tomorrow; too much to do. I haven't had a fever since about noon, so I think I should be okay to go to work ... I'll just try not to breathe on anyone.

Kind of funny ... my baby and I are taking the same meds. Unfortunately, I ended up with the horse pill; why couldn't I get the yummy liquid stuff?! Man, those baby germs.

Snotty-nosed Daycare Baby

2008-10-03T10:14:00.003-05:00

Well, Claire was 100% healthy ... for about a week. She was all better early last week and finished off her antibiotics (which she enjoyed taking - I think it had to do with the novelty of the dropper) this past Saturday. Then, yesterday morning, I noticed a little drip ... just a small run of clear snot coming down. By nighttime, it was the snotty breathing and a low-grade fever. This morning when I went to get her - after she slept in until 8:30 which is completely unheard of - her face was covered in dried snot. Poor baby!

So today I have a distinguished visitor with me as I attempt to work from home. I'm sure that could have taken her into daycare, but there's no sense in me just giving back to the kids what she got from them in the first place. It's actually not too bad now that she can entertain herself pretty well with her room of toys, but it does remind me how badly we need to get those baby gates up! I used to poo-poo at people with snotty-nosed daycare babies ... now I AM that person with the snotty-nosed daycare baby!

In other fabulous parenting news, Claire's pretty much out of diapers, but since I haven't made it back to Babies R US (or Target or wherever) yet, we're scrounging for whatever diapers we have around the house. There's one emergency one in her emergency diaper bag left that I refuse to use, but I did stoop as low as taking some back from the daycare yesterday. :) There is diaper-buying on my list of to-dos for the day. Maybe I'll check out that online diaper site where they deliver to your door! Hmmm ...

And one fun item to leave you with ... Dwo's picture was on the UT sports page! Now, you're probably thinking - as I did - that it means one of the pictures that he took. Not so much, but pretty cool nonetheless. :)

Hook 'em horns!

Sick Baby

2008-09-20T23:05:00.002-05:00

Claire's sick. :( She picked up a cold at daycare a couple of weeks ago. It was pretty much just a runny nose for about 10 days, but right before I left for my trip (literally as I'm packing her into her carrier to go to daycare Monday morning) the cold added on a cough. James said her cough was still there Wednesday when I got home from my trip, so I decided to call the nurses' line on Thursday morning to see whether I should take her in. If Dr. Frank was just going to tell me that it's a cold and we can't do anything about it, I didn't want to bother going in and would go to strollerskate instead. But, the nurse said that given the fact that she had the cold about two weeks at that point, we should bring her in to make sure the fluid wasn't going to her ears. I called the school to let them know Claire wouldn't be in that morning.

Dr. Frank confirmed that her ears looked great (no fluid) but that I was right about the cough; the cold was moving into her lungs. He prescribed her her very first medicines for the bronchilitis (not bronchitis) which pretty much means some inflammation of the lungs. I asked him whether she was contagious, and he said that her cold (well, the snot) was but that the cough wasn't. I asked whether she should go to daycare, and he said that it's probably where she picked it up in the first place and that a common cold is probably expected when that many kids are in close quarters to one another. Sooo ...

I call the school after I pick up Claire's prescription to find out what the procedure is if they need to administer medicine during school. The lady who answered asked how Claire was and I responded, "fine, she just has a small cold". She asked what the doctor called it. I thought it was a random question, but I said, "he said it's a cold moving into her lungs, giving her some brochiolitis, I believe; not bronchitis, though". She said, "oooh ... that sounds very contagious; I don't think you should bring her in". Now, I know where she's coming from, but I specifically asked the doctor, she has had no fever, plus it's already been 10 days so I have a feeling all the kids already had whatever Claire had (or gave it to her in the first place).

I pretty much explained that and her response was "I haven't seen any sick kids in the infant room. There may be some little ones with runny noses due to teething, but there's no notification posted that there is anyone sick." Are you freaking kidding me?! You can just LOOK in the room to see there are snot-nosed kids everywhere. I told that to her in so many words (in a pretty nice way, though, I think). Then she said, "well, I have this paper right here, and what you said she has is very contagious and you're not allowed to bring her in".

Now, if I had an option that day, I would not have, but I had meetings .. and now I was pissed. "Are you a doctor?", I asked. "What?". "ARE YOU A DOCTOR?", I asked again. "No.". "Well, neither am I, but I did ask my doctor whether it was okay to bring her in, and he said yes. What do I need to do in order to clear this up?". She said she'd have to get the director to call me back in a few minutes. Fine.

The director called me back shortly and apologized. She said she looked it up, and it sounds like Claire has a cold that's moving some into her chest (duh) but it would be okay for her to come in. So, I packed her up and dropped her off, but this one's sticking with me.

On Friday, I ended up not having to take her in either because my parents came up to visit. Yes, you read that right; my parents - who canceled their trip up here last week because they decided to stay in Houston to enjoy the beautiful Ike experience despite (or because of?) a mandatory evacuation - decided to come up now that the power was finally back on. Hilarious.

The meds are working, though. Claire was a little groggy on Thursday and Friday, I think mostly due to her first flu shot, but in much better spirits today. I held her to sleep on Friday night to aid the drainage, but she's much, much better today. I'm totally bummed I had to miss strollerskate Thursday and our impromptu playdate Friday, but I'm not willing to get others' little ones sick. My goal right now is just getting her well enough for our normal playgroup next week! It's a little ridiculous how much I look forward to those things, but I really do enjoy them. Something about hanging out with other moms with their babies about the same age as Claire ... so fun!

Home, Sweet Home

2008-09-19T14:26:00.002-05:00

I went on a business trip three days this week, and boy, did it feel like forever. My flight out was late Monday morning, so I hung out with Claire in the morning until about 9 then dropped her off before heading to the airport. James got to play Dad AND Mom Monday night, Tuesday, and Wednesday since my flight didn't get in until about 11:30 Wednesday night.

He did fabulous.

It may have helped that the Saturday before, I went out with "the girls" from Claire's playgroup ... Mom's Night Out! I think it was the longest James had to deal with Claire all on his own, and he handled it like a champ. Gave him good practice for what was to be just a couple of days later! I had a great time and can't wait to do it again.

Actually, the same thing happened a few months prior when I had my "girls' weekend" and stayed away from Claire for the first time. The weekend prior to that other business trip, Syndee and Nina swept me away to do two night away in Southlake ... far enough to not be in the thick of things but close enough to hurry back if necessary. Two days later, I headed to Charlotte. Interesting.

Anywho, I was so ready to come home, and not just because it was an exhausting trip. I actually yearned to see my family. It certainly didn't help that Claire was sick; I ended up taking her to the doctor Thursday morning, and she's on her first set of antibiotics. Snotty and hacking, she's in great spirits. It's good to be home.

On the Ike update, my parents are fine. The night of the storm, my dad and I texted all night (at one point I think he asked me to stop texting so that he could get some sleep), and they got their power back on Tuesday evening (exactly 4 days). The worst thing was having no power, but mostly because there was no circulation (think: no A/C in Houston?! Yikes). They lost a tree in the front yard, but there was no flooding or damage to the house. My mom said it was really interesting in their neighborhood because - even though there was a lot of debris and felled trees - no trees fell on any houses; they all fell towards the street or across yards. Weird, huh?

Here Comes Ike

2008-09-12T21:36:00.004-05:00

Hurrican Ike is here, and by "here" I mean on the Texas coast. It's the first big storm to hit Galveston in 25 years, and I have to admit I'm scared. The last one hurricane to slam Galveston (and Clear Lake, where I grew up) was Alicia back in 1983, and it has a strong impression on me. I guess what happened was my parents moved me from their bedroom to the dining room that night in the dark, and not much longer after, the roof where we were sleeping caved in. I'm not 100% what is actual memories and what is impressions from pictures, but the storm in '83 left a hole in my parents roof, water on the floor, and a huge sense of respect for Mother Nature.

But what's most shocking about this storm is the fact that my parents decided to hunker down and stay at home in Clear Lake. DESPITE the fact that they were planning on visiting Dallas this weekend anyways. DESPITE the fact that their zip code was ordered a mandatory evacuation. DESPITE the fact that they went through Alicia and know the devastation it causes.

Claire and I did a web chat with them earlier and ended up being cut off when their power went out. Luckily we were on cell phones, and those are still working, so I'm still able to keep up with their status. As of right now, Ike is still offshore, my parents are in the dark with flashlights and a radio, and there's a long night ahead.

So now I'm doing my own "hunker" tonight to live Ike from far away. Right now, I'm sitting in front of the TV flipping through all of the news channels to watch the latest updates and getting mad when someone dares to discuss the presidential election rather than the weather. I'm also texting my dad every hour to see how things are going but trying not to because I don't want him to know how scared I am.

The thing I'm dreading most is when the cell towers go down and there will be that period of silence where no communication will get through. Getting through until I hear from them again will be the hardest. What in the world were they thinking?!

Through this I'm also realizing that I have a new sense of purpose in my life. Call it a fear of death or an appreciation of life, but with Claire here now, I would never do anything so risky because she's my priority. Keeping her safe is the most important thing I can do. Maybe if I were younger and riskier, I too would have hunkered down and not have gone anywhere, but now I can't imagine putting my family in such a position; it's not worth it. There is nothing material that's worth the fear it might impose on my child.

It makes me think of another story I heard this morning about a father and his autistic son that were washed out to sea. They treaded water for 14 hours, through the night, until they were rescued. But what makes my heart ache is the account given by the father that, during the night, it was so dark, they couldn't see each other. His son is autistic, so they communicate through Disney phrases. He would call out "To infinity! ... " and his son would reply, "And beyond!" As they floated, they also started floating farther and farther apart until there were moments where he couldn't hear his son at all. I can't even imagine what was going through that father's mind as he tread water in the dark, wondering if his child was still alive. (shudder)

Whew! Okay, well back to TV scanning ... stay dry, family and friends, and I'll talk to you when communications are back up. I'm thinking of you and look forward to hearing that you're all safe and sound.

P.S. A number of you have asked how Claire's sleeping is going. She's actually going down about 9pm each night now, wah-wahing for about 5 minutes, then going to sleep. She stays down (with some grunting and whatever, but we don't go to her) until about 6:15am. Incredible, I know, but I still miss her and sneak it naps with her when I can. :) I'm not 100% sure that she's sleeping all that well - I swear she looks a little tired, but that could also be her cold - but I know it'll get better and better. Thank you for asking!

Missed a "First"?

2008-09-03T23:11:00.003-05:00

One of the things that I regret most about having to be a working mom is that I'm probably going to miss a lot of Claire's "firsts". I've come to terms with it some knowing that after a "first" will always come a "second", a "third", and then it'll just become the everyday norm. If I can't see it right when it happens, well she'll just get used to having to repeat it for me again.

Another thing that makes me feel better is that I might not even recognize if I did see the first ... take yesterday for example. Claire's teachers were so excited that she was copying them by patting another baby on the back that was being burped. It was a pretty big deal, but I don't know that I would have necessarily noted the behavior at being a milestone or first! So maybe it's a good thing that we have those teachers around to tell us when to be excited about the mini-milestones. :)

The Fabled "Magical 4th Night"

2008-09-01T21:00:00.002-05:00

Everyone says that the 4th night is the "magical 4th night" when it all turns around. Apparently you lay the baby down in the crib and they look up, smile at you, and roll over to sleep. To that, I would like to say B-freakin'-S.

For us, Claire was put down after her usual routine: bath, books, bottle, cuddling. We also added a new piece to the beginning of the ritual ... bubbles! After dinner, we're going to give her bubble-time before everything else since she loves it so much.

Tonight, Claire started crying about two seconds after we laid her down in her crib at 8:55. Grrr ... we did the patting and loving words and then quickly left the room to set the timer -- 20 minutes.

At 9:13, 18 minutes later, Claire fell asleep. Whew! At least we didn't even need to go in to console. I do think that it does get easier, perhaps more for the parents than anything else. As much as it still does pain me to hear her cry, it doesn't hurt quite as much or as deeply. Another corner has been turned.

Monday Morning (Sunday Night Contiuation and Follow-up)

2008-09-01T08:24:00.004-05:00

Just thought I'd share since I posted early last night. Claire slept through until 6am when she woke complaining. We made a bottle for James to feed -- which she ate the WHOLE THING -- and then went back to sleep without a peep. At 8am I got up and happened to peek in the room to find her awake and just hanging out in her crib ... no crying, whining, or complaining!

I have the best baby ever. Weissbluth, Ferber, Pantley and Sears ... not exactly sure whose method we ended up using, but I'm feeling pretty good about it and am glad that we did it. Now if only I can figure out how to fall asleep myself!

Tonight's the true test because we head back to work tomorrow. Our intervals are 20-30-30. Thank you to everyone for all your support! All of your words of encouragement and similar stories really did help us get through this whole adventure that much better.

Day 3: Sunday Night

2008-09-01T01:45:00.000-05:00

Another fun-filled, action-packed day today. We hung out with Dwo and Crystal -- at home making breakfast, at the mall shopping, and at sushi buffet! I haven't had real sushi (and a lot of it) since when I first found out I was pregnant, so I definitely enjoyed myself tonight. I gave myself a little treat by taking a nap with Claire earlier as well. I know, I should be sleep training her for naps, too ... but I figure that since I don't see her during the day much, I'll let her wonderful teachers at school deal with that little problem. :)

Okay, so for the meat of it ... it's 15-20-30 tonight ... here we go:

9:00pm - Super-tired from playing a bunch (Claire LOVES bubbles), we do bath, books, bottle, and cuddling. We say goodbye to Dwo and Crystal who are headed back for Austin and cuddle some more.
9:30pm - Eye rubbing and droopy eyes galore, Claire's ready for bed. This time, she wastes no time figuring it out and starts crying as soon as I lay her down in her crib! We hurry out and set the timer -- 15 minutes.
9:40pm (10 minutes into the 15 minutes) - The screaming crying is just complaining exclamations now. It's like she's saying, "hey! you! this is annoying! meanies!" but at least not yelling at the top of her lungs.
9:42pm (12 minutes into the 15 minutes) - Silence. Asleep. Seriously. AND her head is turned to the side, AND I can see it in the video monitor clearly. Wowsers.
10:20pm - Wakes crying, softly at first, then in more earnest. I set the timer -- 15 minutes.
10:28pm (8 min into the 15 min) - Asleep again.
10:33pm (11 min into the 15 min? Or should it be a new 15 min?) - Up and crying again, but it's not bad. Just her yelling.
10:37pm - We go in there, but even as we're approaching the crib, we realize the crying is just her calling out but not actual cries. We sneak back out to watch her on the video monitor without alerting her to our presence.
10:42pm - She's managed to make her way to the other end of the crib, but she's quiet and appears to be asleep.
11:24pm - Up again. I set the timer just to be consistent (15 minutes), but I think I'll just wait to see if her crying escalates to needing to console her. I'm thinking no, though.
11:30pm (5 min into the 15 min) - Asleep. I'm thinking that maybe I stop timing and just go with the gut for these night wakings. Or maybe don't time until the crying out becomes all-out crying. Also thinking maybe I should try and go to sleep.
1:40am - Maybe I'm the one that needs sleep training. How come I can't take advantage of this and sleep?! I miss aving Claire's little warm body next to mine and being able to snuggle up. :( Okay, okay, here I go to try the whole sleep thing again.

The final tally (at least until 1:40am):

Time to sleep: 12 minutes (-10 min from last night)
Times woken up in night: 2
Times we had to go in: 0 (we did once, but we didn't HAVE to)

Tomorrow is 20-30-30, and then we'll just do 30 min for now on. Hopefully (crossing fingers) it doesn't matter since we never even got to the "20" from the 15-20-30 intervals tonight.

Bye-Bye Pump

2008-08-31T23:15:00.001-05:00

Done with pumping as of Friday, I've packed up all my stuff and put it away. The pump, bottles, tubing, all that jazz. I have a bunch of extra storage bags and other supplies that I'll probably offer to the many moms who have had babies recently; apparently I was a little overly ambitious as to how much I'd be pumping or how much longer. Our kitchen counter is so much more open! I'm both relieved and a little sad ... my baby is growing up too fast!

In other news, our house is pretty darn clean right now because straightening up gives you something to do while you're listening to your baby cry. Cathy taught me that, and it's absolutely true.

Day 2: Saturday Night

2008-08-31T06:41:00.000-05:00

Today we kicked things off earlier than yesterday, mostly because we're all exhausted. Not only did James and I not get much sleep last night, we were ambitious and went on a morning walk, to Costco, to a free Gymboree class, and Wal-Mart during the day. At first, we expected to start the process around 9 or 10 again tonight, but I had a feeling that there was no way Claire would make it that late. Here's how it played out:

8:00pm - Bath, book, cuddling. Didn't do bottle because Claire showed no interest in it. We actually just finished eating not too long before, so we knew she didn't want it. However, it leaves the question of whether she's going to need to eat at some point during the night; we'll figure that out when we get there.
8:20pm - Lots of eye-rubbing and head burying, so we lay her down. She's smiling some until the moment that we turn off the light and head out of the room. She went directly into the loud, long crying. Yesterday's intervals were 5-10-15 min, so today is 10-15-20. James sets the timer -- 10 minutes.
8:27pm (7 min into our 10 min) - It sounded like her crying was subsiding, but then it gathered again full force.
8:30pm - We head in there to pat her on her back and tell her how much we love her. She doesn't stop crying this time when we console her; it almost sounds like her cries get louder! :( We head out after a few minutes already planning to go back in again after this next interval. She's sweating again from all the crying, so we turn down the A/C a notch. James sets the timer -- 15 minutes.
8:40pm (7 min into our 15 min) - The crying subsides and becomes crying out noises instead. I'm holding my breath hoping that the worst might be over.
8:42pm (9 min into our 15 min) - I finally exhale (I swear I was holding my breath the whole time); silence! I crank up the monitor volume -- which I had turned all the way down before because no monitor was needed to hear her -- and relish in the deep breaths I hear coming from the device. She's asleep!
8:48pm - The timer goes off marking 15 minutes, but we don't need to go in because she's asleep. We spend a couple of minutes discussing what we'll do if she wakes to feed, but decide that we're too tired to make a really rational decision, so we'll just play it by ear when and if the time comes.
10:04pm - Dwo and Crystal are here! Yay! And Claire's still asleep! Double-yay!
10:30pm - Okay, I'm headed to bed ... our actual bed this time. As I'm getting ready for bed, I realize that this is the first time in 6 months and 3+ weeks that I have the opportunity to sleep with James in the same room all night, just the two of us.
10:43pm - Claire wakes up crying literally as I'm laying down in my own bed and my head touches the pillow. James and I agree that if she's still crying after her 10 minutes are up, I'll offer her the bottle since she didn't take much formula today. I set the timer -- 10 min.
10:45pm (2 min into the 10 min) - I can't stand just lying in bed listening to her cry for 10 minutes, so I get up, go to the living room, and update this blog while watching the video monitor and the countdown. Our video monitor also doesn't work in our room (distance between our rooms is too far), so I have to leave the master in order to watch.
10:51pm (9 min into the 10 min) - Crying subsides ... then increases ... ebb ... flow ... wax ... wane ... 1 more minute.
10:53pm - I go in and mix her bottle. She's still whimpering after I pick her up meaning she must be legitimately hungry. She finishes about 4 ounces and then falls asleep. Uh-oh. Now what? Aren't I supposed to put her in her crib with her "sleepy but not asleep"? But I'm not dumb enough to wake a sleeping baby, either. I contemplate my options.
11:02pm - I decide to put her down in her crib and just see what happens. She, of course, wakes up pretty immediately. What was I so worried about? :P I leave her room and set the timer -- 15 minutes.
11:07pm (2 min into the 15 min) - I go back into the master bedroom to turn the audio monitor back on so that (meanly) James has to listen to the crying, too. Hey, why should I be the only one suffering through? On my way to the bedroom I recognize that I'm not going to be sleeping in the master tonight. Another night on the couch for me!
11:09pm (4 min into the 15 min) - In the master, I realize that the audio monitor IS already on ... yet somehow James is still able to snore soundly over the noise. I recognize that he's exhausted, but seriously?! That has got to be a man-talent of some kind.
11:11pm (6 min into the 15 min) - The crying subsides and turns into the "nooooo .... nooooo" noises.
11:12pm (7 min into the 15 min) - Silence. Claire's asleep. Whew. Except that I'm pretty sure she's sleeping face-down based on both the video and audio. I debate going in there to turn her head.
11:20pm - Timer sounds signaling the 15 min are up, but she's asleep, so I decide to lay down on the couch instead and not worry about turning her head.
12:05am - Claire wakes again, and this time she means it! I set the timer -- 10 min again
12:11am (7 min into 10 min) - James comes out of the bedroom (my diobolical plan worked) and Dwo and Crystal join in the waiting and watching party.
12:14am - With just secounds left, she falls asleep. Even with the timer counting down to zero, her breathing is slowing. Dwo and Crystal cheer.
2:10am - James wakes up, out of habit, I think. He turns down the A/C because the termostat schedule had the temp up to 78. We realize that we're going to have an entire additional A/C unit cooling the majority of our house at night just to keep Claire comfortable when we used have just the unit on our side of the house wth the master running. Look forward to those future eletricity bills. :P We go back to sleep.
3:35am - Up again; 10 minute timer.
3:39am (4 min into 10 min) - She's silent, though not asleep, rolling around the crib.
3:40am (5 min into 10 min) - She makes her "noooo ... nooooo" noises.
3:41am (6 min into 10 min) - Silence.
3:45am - Timer goes off, but everyone's already asleep.
*** Some stuff may or may not have happened here. If it did, it was minor, and I was too tired to remember or care.***
6:30am - Claire's starting to stir. My internal clock has me springing awake, on-call, and ready to make her a bottle and semi-start our day.
6:47am - She went back to sleep! Sheesh. Fine, I'll lay back down, too.
7:30am - Okay, it's late enough, right? She's been rolling around her crib for awhile, and I'm ready to go see my baby! I head in and start the day!

The final tally:

Time to sleep: 22 minutes (-6 min from last night)
Times woken up in night: 4, not counting actual waking time (same as last night)
Times we had to go in: Once to give her a bottle. Pretty good!

For Day 3? 15-20-30 min intervals! Yikes! Wish us luck!

Deep breath Here we go ... Day 1: Friday night

2008-08-30T08:05:00.000-05:00

I figured I'd blog about the "Cry It Out" weekend since it's such a HUGE event for me. I've been dreading having to do this, and I have had no qualms letting anyone that will listen know how I don't want to do it but know that we need to. This may be my longest blog ever ... seriously.

4:30pm - Pick up Claire from daycare. Usually I get her about 6:00, but knowing what is about to take place tonight, I figure an extra hour of play will do both of us some good. Well, at least me. I find out when I pick her up that she has not taken her later afternoon nap. Uh-oh.
5:30pm - Claire and I fall asleep together cuddled up on the chaise (our favorite sleeping-together place) after playing for the last hour. I figure this is like a last hurrah and it'll only last her typical 30-minutes, so no big deal.
7:15pm - We wake up from our marathon nap. Whoops. Hmm ... I wonder how this will impact the rest of the night's agenda. At least we're up in time for our normal dinner time! Since a lot of the literature I've read says that you should delay your bedtime ritual the first night until the time the baby usually falls asleep, we'll play until 9:00 (when she usually falls asleep in my arms).
9:00pm - Bath, books, bottle, cuddling. Whole thing takes about 45 minutes, and this is when she falls asleep in my arms, right? Nope. Little girl is happy, perky, jabbering, and in no way ready for bed. Yikes.
10:20pm - A yawn! Okay, this is it ... directions are to place her in her bed, sleepy but not asleep, so that she can associate going to sleep and not just waking up there. We can do this ... *deep breath!* ... down she goes and ... she looks up and smiles at us! What?! Will it be that easy? James and I head to the living room to start the night.
10:25pm - The crying starts, plaintively at first. Watching from our video monitor, we can tell that it's that coy mewing where she says "wah-wah" but is taking glances at the video monitor to make sure we're watching. She's working her way around her crib, rolling, rocking, on her back, on her stomach, on her knees, on her feet, head down, head up; our little gymnast/monkey is telling us she does not want to be there. I start my timer -- 5 minutes.
10:30pm - Timer goes off, but we're already heading into her room to pat her on the back and tell her how much we love her because I've been watching the timer tick down the last two minutes. She immediately stops crying and waits patiently for us to pick her up. We stick by the plan and head back out after a minute or two of soothing.
10:32pm - The crying starts again, this time in earnest. I think she was surprised that we actually left the room instead of taking her with us! I start the timer -- 10 minutes.
10:42pm - We go back in again to pat her on the back and tell her how much we love her. Again, she stops crying when we enter the room and looks at us in anticipation. She's definitely tiring and seems to almost fall asleep on my hand that I put on her arm to pat her. Still, we stick by our plan and head back out, this time turning down the A/C a degree because she seems to be sweating with all that crying.
10:43pm - Wailing starts, long and loud. My stomach clenches, I turn off the audio on the monitor, and I turn up the TV.
10:54pm (11 minutes into our 15 minutes) - The crying slows and turns into her blah-blah-blahing noises that she makes before she falls asleep each night. It's her way of telling me each night that she'd rather stay up than fall asleep; I think she's say "noooo ... nooo ... I don't wanna go to bed!" right before she passes out. A secret? It's pretty close to what I do when I'm rolling around in bed on nights that I can't fall asleep either; like mother, like daughter. I think the last time that happened was sometime around the week before Claire was born ... has it really been 7 months since I've had a full night's sleep?!
10:56pm (13 minutes into our 15 minutes) - Deep breathing and ... silence?!
10:57pm (34 seconds later) - Timer goes off to let us know we can go comfort her, but -- guess what? -- we don't need to because she's asleep. Wowsers.
11:00pm - I get nervous because it's too quiet, it seemed so easy, and I start thinking that maybe she passed out instead of falling asleep. Or she can't breathe because she's face down. I turn up the monitor all the way to try and hear her breathing. I think I hear a hiccup and relax.
11:02pm - I sneak into her room through the jack-n-jill bath to adjust the monitor so that I can see the back of her head because she has fallen asleep with her head jammed into the corner just out of view. That's better.
11:03pm - The back of her head isn't good enough. I sneak into her room further and use my iPhone flashlight to make sure I can see her back rising and falling and that her nose is unobstructed. Her face is pressed into the nubby yarns of her blanket, but I'm pretty sure she's okay. I restrain from touching her at all.
11:18pm - I turn the monitor all the way up again to make sure she's breathing, but the music in her room is louder than her breathing. I debate on whether to go turn her head. I decide not to do it; why chance waking her up?
11:55pm - Still sleeping. I realize I should probably go to sleep instead of waiting up and watching the monitor because if she wakes up in the middle of the night - like she's wont to do around 2am - I might need some sleep to do this over again!

12:00 Midnight - Claire stirs and starts crying. I swear I didn't do anything. I've been sitting here on the couch working on my blog updates! I wait a little while to see if it's going to persist, then start the timer -- 5 minutes.
12:03am (3 minutes into the 5 minutes) - She settles back down and appears to fall back asleep. I think I'll leave the timer running down anyways (I know, I know, I'm weak). BTW, James has been asleep on the couch next to me for about 30 minutes now. Lucky guy, though I don't know how he does it!
12:07 - Timer goes off, but she's asleep so I keep blogging. [For future reference, if you're working on two blogs at the same time and upload pictures to one, don't be surprised if the pictures show up on the second one instead!]
12:30am - Still asleep. I finish posting Claire's latest blog update and continue uploading pictures to Ofoto and videos to YouTube (which is SOOO slow, btw). I have a ton of them I'm planning on uploading this weekend, although if I don't end up going to sleep like I should, I might just finish them tonight!
12:45am - Claire wakes up. I know this because I have been watching the video monitor even as I'm watching TV (love "Psych"; so funny!) and post captions on pictures I just uploaded. But no crying ensues, so no timer needed! Less than a minute later, it appears as though she's back asleep.
12:55am - Head moving again, but - again - no crying. So why aren't I asleep?!
1:30am - Okay, I finished my "Psych" episode, I can hear her breathing (though she's still sleeping face down), I've finished captioning the pictures I added tonight, and my last video is uploading now. Guess I'll try to get some winks!
1:45am - Claire just cried out a couple of times and turned in her crib. Now I can't see her head again! Sheesh. We're getting close to her usual "waking at 2am for a few minutes" time. We'll see how this goes. Oh, and yes, I'm still awake. Debbie's up so we're emailing back and forth.
1:59am - For real crying out now, a bit plaintively. She's looking around for us and wondering what in the world is going on. I start the timer -- 5 minutes.
2:02am (3 minutes into our 5 minutes) - She activates the crib toy, "Blue hippo! <>". She stops crying to check out her noisemaker and then resumes crying out but not actually crying.
2:04am - Timer goes off, but James (who has woken up) and I debate whether to go in since she's not crying anymore. We decide to wait.
2:06am - The "nooooo .... nooooo .... don't wanna fall asleep" noises are back. I'm hoping this means she's falling back asleep. Just three more hours until I allow myself to go to her and feed her!
2:11am - Silence. Trying to decide whether I should go turn the video again so that I can see her. I decide that I should try to sleep instead, and even if I do fix the camera, she'll probably just turn around again anyways.
2:30am - Sigh, still awake. Got distracted looking for Claire's Halloween costume and watching a documentary about Nike (swoosh!).
3:00am - Okay, going to sleep (I guess now it's just take a nap). For real. Honestly. Since we decided to camp out on the couch this weekend, all I need to do is CLOSE THE LAPTOP NOW. Okay, okay, here I go ...
4:35am - Up again, some crying again. I start the timer -- 5 minutes.
4:39am (3 minutes into our 5 minutes) - Blah-blah-blahing. Let's go past our 5 minutes and see.
4:41am - Quiet ... sleep!
6:10am - Crying again. We give it a couple of minutes but decide that this time sounds more like true "I'm hungry!" calls.
6:14am - Bottle is made, and James heads into the room while I watch on the monitor. The cries intensify when she sees Daddy walk through the door and immediately stop when he picks her up.
6:18am - Nothing to watch because Baby is out of the frame.
6:20am - Here comes James with (awake) baby in one hand and bottle in the other. No interest in eating, huh? We confer on what to do. Put her back in her crib? But is she ready to get up? What if she falls asleep? Claire cuddles while we get analysis-paralysis.
6:40am - Now we figure it's late enough to just stay up (not that 6:20 wasn't but 6:40 really does make sense). James takes Claire to her room to play, and I pass out on the couch.
7:30am - Claire's back, she's stayed up, and now I'm up, too. I declare last night a great success! Now to figure out what to do during the day ... I never read that far in the books on what to do with naps. Hahaha. Well, even if I mess this one up, it's the poor daycare that gets to deal with the aftermath on most days (sorry, girls)!

The final tally:

Time to sleep: 28 minutes
Times woken up in night: 4 (not counting actual waking time)
Times we had to go in at night: 0 <-- ZERO!

Tonight: 10-15-20 min intervals! I'm not dreading it as much as I did last night, but I'm definitely curious how it'll turn out!

Finito, finitus, fini, fertig ... finished

2008-08-29T08:21:00.000-05:00

Today was the day. I've pumped my last pumping for Claire. The last few weeks I was doing 2 pumpings a day which went down to one last week, and - as of today - I'm done. I have three saved frozen bags in the freezer that I've been hoarding (for what, I don't know), so she's get one bottle each day over the Labor Day weekend, and then we're all formula until she's 1!

Maybe I've been saving those bags knowing the other thing we're doing this weekend (yes, "crying it out") almost as a "I'm sorry, baby!" offering ... :)

More on the "other activity" shortly (gulp!).

Mommy has an Owwie

2008-08-24T21:37:00.000-05:00

So Claire got me good on Friday. Somehow, my spastic daughter managed to poke me in the eye while flailing around playing, actually getting a finger (or fingernail) ON my eyeball, and now it's red and ugly on the side of my iris. I'm still trying to decide whether to go to the doctor (and would I go to an eye doctor or a normal doctor?) or just see if it'll heal. Although today, I'm starting to lean towards going to see someone now that I think it's raised up where her finger made contact (eewww ....). It's so frustrating because you can't exactly look at the corner of your eye in the mirror (ever tried it?) so I don't know exactly how it looks except for how James describes it to me and the couple of pretty disgusting pictures I've taken so far. I do not recommend trying to take pictures of your eyeball.

Good times.

(Sort of) Funny First-day-of-daycare Story

2008-08-18T22:45:00.000-05:00

So, today's Claire's first day at daycare, and I'm doing okay! This morning, Claire slept in late (as she's been doing recently), so I steathily moved her to her pack and play so that I could get dressed, pump, and pack my lunch. She woke up while James was getting dressed, and between the two of us, we did a really good job getting us ready as well as her bottles made, bag packed, and ready to go.

When we got there, Claire had no problems going to the teacher and hung out in her lap for a little while. James and I had to fill out some paperwork, so we alternated doing that and peeking in the window of the room a few times. When we were leaving, she'd moved onto the floor and was starting to play with the other little kiddos.

My (sort of) funny story? So this afternoon about 3:30 (while I'm in a meeting) my cell phone rings and my caller ID shows "Primrose School of Castle Hills" since I added them to my contacts. I blaze out of the conference room already answering my phone while walking.

"Hello, Mrs. Pee? This is xxx from the Primrose School of Castle Hills. How are you doing?" Seriously, HOW AM I DOING?! Daycare calls in the middle of the first day I drop her off to ask me how I'm doing?! She should have just skipped any niceties and tell me WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BABY!

Needless to say, I skipped the "I'm fine" and went with "what's wrong?". (pause) "We were wondering if there was a second jar of food for her lunch." O-M-G ... so, after I caught my breath and stopped having my minor embolism, I told her that it was in the fridge behind her bottles. I kept her on the phone some extra time to ask how Claire's day was and how things were going (I figured I was due given the heart attack); fine on all accounts.

This evening when I went to pick her up, she was all smiles. I can almost pretend that it was smiles from beginning to end, but I have a feeling that wasn't exactly the case. There were a few rough patches today, I know, but I also know that it'll be fine and that she's going to be well taken care of by the folks there. She took 2 4-oz bottles (may be a first!), ate food, and played with the other kids. Her little friend Sofia will be joining her in a few weeks, so that will be fun, too.

All in all, a good first day.

Happy Anniversary

2008-08-17T19:11:00.000-05:00

This past Friday, August 15th, was James and my 7-year anniversary. It's hard to believe that it's been 7 years since we said our vows in The Chapel by the Sea at Kauai Lagoons. It truly was a fairy tale wedding with most of our family and closest friends attending. I'm so ready to go back! Vow renewals, anyone?

Not only is it our 7-year wedding anniversary, 8/22 marks TEN YEARS since James and my unofficial first date. It's hard to say when James had our very first date ... was it the lunch at Villa Capri? When he helped me move in? Our actual first date at The Oasis and Putt-Putt? Really, it doesn't matter which event was truly the first ... what's most important is that, even 10 YEARS later, I'm still so in love with this amazing man and honored that he's my husband.

It's hard to imagine that I ever would have found someone that complements me as well as James. He washes, I fold; I load the dishes, he unloads; he'll take mornings while I stay up at night. There is compromise, laughter, and knowing that tomorrow is another day. James makes me want to be a better wife and mother because he raises the bar every day ... plus I need to make sure he doesn't get that 7-year itch!

In the past, James and I have used our anniversary (first date or wedding) as an excuse to go on a trip somewhere. But, with the new house and baby, we decided to just keep it local this year. Instead, we had a lunch date to L&L Hawaiian BBQ in Lewisville, and yet it was still perfect. Together, we tried something new, we reminisced about the years we've been together, and we even brought in a little bit of the Islands. Even if I can't renew my vows in Hawaii anytime soon, I'd marry him all over again. Here's to 7 (or 10!) years together and 70 (or 100!) more!

For those who haven't seen this, here's a video that my little bro Dwo put together for us of our wedding:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vua3d0U_wnU

i ...

2008-08-14T14:02:00.000-05:00

I saw this on Corrie’s blog and really liked what she shared. I took a stab at mine below and found out it’s a lot harder than you would think! If you happen to do this yourself, send me your answers!

i am: proud to be a wife, mother, daughter, friend, employee, manager, woman
i dream: in 1st person and techno-color
i think: I’m a pretty nice person, for the most part
i know: that I know so little
i want: to retire in 10 years (you hear that, James?)
i have: everything that I truly need
i wish: I could work part-time with the same money and benefits
i hate: being so far away from family
i miss: sleep … glorious, uninterrupted, just-because-you-can-sleep sleep!
i fear: that I’ll forget to stop and smell the roses
i feel: blessed to have so much
i hear: the wheels turning as I scheme up a new adventure
i smell: with my nose much better than James
i crave: hugs and kisses
i search: for my keys every morning because I never put them in the same place
i wonder: what I’ll be when I grow up
i regret: nothing for too long; what’s the point?
i love: wholly with no reservations
i ache: having to leave Claire every morning
i care: too much sometimes
i always: see things from both sides of the story
i am not: the person who will decide where to eat
i believe: in miracles
i dance: with Claire to make her laugh
i sing: out loud in the car, usually with the wrong lyrics
i cry: in secret
i don’t always: say what I’m really thinking
i hope: I am a good role model for my daughter
i fight: as little as possible but to the death for what I truly believe in
i write: emails instead of picking up the phone
i lose: my train of thought more than I … what was I saying?
i listen: with my heart, then my head
i can usually be found: online
i need: to admit when I need help
i am happy about: being alive
i desire: to be a better wife, mother, daughter, and friend

Work-Life Balance

2008-08-08T00:01:00.000-05:00

Well, here I am at midnight stealing a moment to type a post on my blog ... taking a break from doing some necessary tasks for work while simultaneously hand-pumping so that I don't disturb my sleeping baby and husband not 10 feet away. Hmmm ... is this what they mean by "work-life balance"?

Seriously, though, it's a tough job being a working mom. I am absolutely not knocking being a stay-at-home mom which I think, in so many ways, is even harder than working. SAHM's are on-call 24/7, and I've found that they often suddenly feel as though they need to bear the weight of the home on their shoulders: women who never cooked before crack open those cookbooks; they clean like they've never cleaned before; they somehow become that June Cleaver they never imagined being. But I do have to say that, while I may not be home with Claire all day during the day, there is no such thing as a part-time mom. Even as I'm at work in a meeting or driving to the office, I'm balancing thinking about what I need to do that day with what needs the baby has right now and what I need to do when I get home for her.

However, I made the decision to keep working as an investment into both James and my future. I could selfishly say that I want to stay home, but I need to think of the longer term impacts and whether that's truly what I want ... sigh.

Another decision I made was that I'm no longer going to pump at the office. Claire is officially 6 months, and my supply is pretty much nonexistant anyways. Starting today, I've decided to pump once in the morning (a measly 2oz) and once at night (another measly 2oz) so that she can get at least some breastmilk each day, even if it's just one feeding. We'll see how long I can keep that up until my 4oz wane to 3, 2, 1 ... I would stop altogether, but that whole "foot and mouth" story of Kenny and Brenna's keeps going through my head -- and with Claire starting daycare in a couple of weeks, I have a feeling she's going to need all the antibodies she can get!

Back to work!

Too Soon to Celebrate

2008-08-03T15:06:00.000-05:00

Okay, I know it's too soon to celebrate, but Claire technically slept through the night! Sort of. 2 night in a row now, she skipped her middle-of-the-night feeding (yes, she was still getting a middle-of-the-night feeding ... until now!) so she would take her last bottle and not need another until early morn, take that one, and then sleep some more. That means she's sleeping about 7 hours straight (with a little tossing and turning at her old feeding time) then adding another 3 hours as bonus. Fabulous!

Well, there's the small detail that the last bottle was about 10:30 (a smidge later than the 8:00 she was doing), and her "sleep some more" would go until 8:30. It's not that bad on the weekends, but I'm not sure how that's going to work tomorrow when I need to go to work. I have a feeling telling my bosses "well, I can't come in until 10 because I have to sleep with my daughter until 8:30" isn't going to fly.

There is the option that I just get up after the early morn bottle (has been about 5:30), but I'm NOT a morning person. Kim, I don't know how you do it every morning ... and you other moms, too, of course. I think the schedule the last 2 night has been perfect ... now if only I can convince work of the same ...

Baby's First Cold

2008-08-01T12:56:00.000-05:00

Claire has her first ailment. It's just a minor summer cold as far as illnesses go, but I still feel bad for her. She's got a slight cough (all dry, not wet or hacking) that's actually pretty cute. I couldn't tell if she had just learned she could make the noise or she was actually coughing. She also has a runny nose, but other than that, no fever, no ear infection, or anything else.

Being a first time mommy, I struggled with whether to take her into the doctor. I don't want to be that mom that runs to the doctor at the first sneeze, but I also don't want to be negligent mommy that should have taken her but didn't. That lasted from Tuesday until Wednesday night when I saw the first indication of her pulling her ear (okay, she could have been scratching her head) and made an appointment first thing Thursday morning.

Dr. Frank said (just as I thought but wanted to confirm) it's just a minor summer cold and there's not much we can do except keep her head elevated at night and suction her nose. There's no swelling of the throat, and he even described her ears as "perfect". Given that Claire doesn't seem to realize that she's even sick, I'm thinking I'm okay with the diagnosis.

Oh, except I've had a scratchy throat this week as well and was hoping that I could use her appointment to diagnose myself so that I don't have to go to the doctor. Is that so bad? :) I'm also feeling a little guilty because I'm not sure if I got sick first and gave it to Claire or she got sick first and gave it to me ... either way, one of us definitely gave it to James. Just keeping it all in the family!

One thing did come out of the appointment. I asked Dr. Frank if it was worth still pumping if Claire's only getting 6-8oz a day ... he said yes, every ounce counts. So, onward pumping I go! I don't mind it really, I just wish there were more. The fenugreek did nothing for me, so I'm going to try and get my hands on Mother's Milk Tea this weekend (a blend of fenugreek and blessed thistle). All my other questions I'm saving for next week at Claire's 6 month appointment. SIX MONTHS!

Lollapeelooza: Redux

2008-08-01T11:54:00.000-05:00

Redux - adj - brought back; returned; resurgent

Yup, it's back. We finally brought back Lollapeelooza. It's been a couple of crazy years between building a new house and being pregnant, but we had a good excuse to throw a party this year. I won the Dreyer's Slow Churned Neighborhood Salute again which meant that I needed to get all of that ice cream out of the house!

James and I rented the CH Community Center (such a great deal), got a bounce house from Trish's company Bounce for Fun (we also checked it for quality beforehand by jumping in it), and catered fajitas from Avalon's (I'm all about supporting the local folk). Other than that, snacks and ice cream toppings were all we needed!

The plan was to have the party from 11-2, so I asked to rent the place from 10:30-2:30 (you know me, I like to make sure everything's in order). Fran - the lady that runs the center on the weekends - said it wasn't necessary because we were the only booking for the day, so 11-2 was fine. Save $30? Sure! She even gave us a key to let ourselves in the morning of at whatever time we wanted.

Come Sunday morning at 9:30, we're all up and raring to go. James' dad had already run out to get us bags of ice, the cars were all parked, and Claire was dressed. We show up at the Community Center and the room was filled ... BY A CHURCH! Now, I'm willing to do a lot of things, but throwing a church out of a space isn't one of them. We sweetly asked what time they would be done and were told they usually run until 11. Um, yeah, that wasn't exactly going to work for us. I think they heard the panic in my voice because they said they would get out of there by 5 'til. Gee, thanks.

We spent the next hour getting ready in the lobby (packing coolers, setting up trays, melting queso) while the sermon was happening. I believe it was during one singing stretch that the bounce house was inflated right outside their window (I can only imagine what a sight that was!) and during the closing remarks was when James and I were scrambling into the house to try it out. We had purposely not taken Claire on a walk in the morning so that she wouldn't inadvertantly take a nap, so she fell asleep for the hour right before the party started (perfect!), and, as soon as those doors were opened at 10:50, you can bet your bubkus that we were scurrying into the hall to set-up in record time.

The party itself was great. The first hour or so was pretty much Horizon Lines folks (way to represent!), then there was a flood of folks around noon when babies' morning naps were finished. I have to say, the 12-1 hour was pretty darn overwhelming. Our final RSVP list was somewhere around 60 adults and 30 children, and it sounded like everyone was there during that middle hour. But most of the kiddos were little, so we didn't really have to worry about lots of kids underfoot. Then, from 1-2, things slowed back down again and nicely wrapped up right at 2 so that we could quickly clean up and get out of there for the 2:30 party after ours. They extended the rental on our jump house when they came to pick it up. :)

I only wish I had been able to talk to everyone more and had remembered to take more pictures, but it was so good to see everyone! I can't wait for next year's, but I think I'll give myself at least a few days off before I start planning. Hehe.

It is amazing to think that we have truly reached another chapter of our lives. This was the first party of ours that was truly PG-rated. Not that we had drunken debaucharies before, but this was definitely the most kid-friendly. And it was fun! Does this mean I've finally grown up? Scary.

Slow down, baby!

2008-07-12T22:14:00.000-05:00

Is it wrong of me to want Claire to slow down her growth and development? I feel like it's all happening too fast! Plus, sometimes I look at her, and I wonder if it really is happening too early?! The teeth growing, the sitting up, the drinking from a straw and a cup, the wanting to feed herself ... I keep wanting to tell her to slow down, baby!

Our First Trip -- the dirty details

2008-07-12T21:44:00.000-05:00

Just got back from Aspen ... our family real family trip. I have to say, before going out there, I had no qualms at all about traveling with her. Although I was nervous about the plane ride (and being "those people"), lots of folks have told me that babies just get lulled to sleep by the engine, so I figured that would be the worst of it.

On our flight from Dallas to Vail, Claire did not sleep. She wasn't exactly "that" baby, but she refused to settle down, didn't want to take her (overdue) nap, and was not happy being confined to a seat. Luckily, it's only a 2 hour flight, there was an empty seat in our row so that we could spread out, and our flight attendant didn't mind when I ended up walking with her up the aisle. She fell asleep as the plane was landing. I give Claire a C- ... James gave her an F.

My parents picked us up in Vail to drive us the hour and a half to Aspen. Claire, who usually sleeps in the car, proceeded to have a meltdown for the first 15 minutes or so. I gave her a D ... James gives her an F.

Once in Aspen, things were much better. We all had a touch of altitude sickness ... the worst of it for Claire was when we went up the Aspen mountain gondola and Claire threw up (not spit up) while we were up there. I give me and James an F for putting our baby through that ordeal. :(

The biggest drama of the week ended up being a non-pooping baby. Claire was a VERY poopy baby (think multiple times a day) up until she started solids and formula a month ago. Since then, it's been a little bit more here and there, but never more than 2 days. While in Aspen, she went from Friday until Wednesday without doing her business. It became a pretty big deal to where I called the pediatrician to ask for advice. They suggested brown sugar w/water first ... Claire didn't like it much, but she drank it. Nothing. Next, diluted apple and/or prune juice; Claire didn't like either. How did I end up with a child that doesn't like sweets?! So, nothing. Added in a little rectal stimulation. Still nada. In the end, we ended up with the suppository to do the trick, and suddenly we went from fussy to happy baby!

So, again to summarize ... Saturday through Thursday were "eh", poop on Thursday morning, and then Thursday and Friday were fabulous! Saturday (this morning) Claire did a great job on the trip back to Vail (A) and was the best baby ever on the plane (A+!).

The trip itself was good. I love seeing my whole family together, and everyone loves Claire so much. Claire had tons of firsts, growth, and development -- she's sitting up on her own without tripoding, she holds her straw like a real adult, she went in the pool for the first time -- and it was nice to hang out with her for long periods of time. I haven't been able to spend just normal days with her since my maternity leave, so I really enjoyed this quality time.

Next vacation ... Outer Banks in October for Daphne's wedding! I'll have my supplies ready. :)

Projectile Vomiting and Bleeding Scalps

2008-07-05T11:32:00.001-05:00

Last Sunday, Claire tried a new food. Having mastered rice cereal and bananas (she's more fond of the former than the latter), we thought we'd try something new and selected sweet potatoes (the baby food variety) as the winner. James and I bought the organic kind from Babies R Us, and Claire ate it for dinner very eagerly.

Later than evening, Claire was also super fussy due to teething (we think) so we gave her some Tylenol before going to bed. I was holding my little angle after she finished her formula just gently rocking when .... BLEEEEEEEEEECH ... she proceeds to vomit all over me, herself, the glider, and pretty much everything else in our vicinity. I sat there in horror for a second debating me options while Claire sits and grins at me. The girl has spit up before, but never this much. I didn't even know her stomach could hold that much food!

"James!" I call hoping he can hear me through the monitor. "Jaaaammmmmmeeeessss!" Nothing. I kind of pick her up but hobbling because I want to avoid driping any more spew and head to our bathroom. As I strip her down to put her in her bouncy chair (we keep it in our bathroom), I noticed that there was a red mark by her eye. Geez, not only did she throw up, she scratched her eye! I grab a face towel off the ring and wipe her down before heading to the changing table to re-dress her.

I get the diaper on (it's an increasingly difficult job as she becomes more mobile) and a sleep sack on when I notice the red mark has grown to cover her entire face. Horrified, I reopen her sleep sack and see that the blotchiness covers her entire body!

My options run through my head ... was it the sweet potatoes? The Tylenol? The formula? Can I give her Benadryl if she just had Tylenol? But what if she threw it up?! I run into her bath past James who's trying to clean off the glider and dunk her into the tub and sponge her off. Luckily, it seems to work even though she's still a little itchy in the head.

Crisis averted, we noticed that there was some booming noises outside. The Castle Hills 4th of July celebration (yes, on 29th). Our little family unit gathered on the window seat in our dining room to watch the show and settle down after all the drama.

And bleeding scalp? Claire's head itches either due to eczema or cradle cap, so she's been scratching in a comical hand on head scratch-scratch-scratch kind of way. We're forcing her to wear a sleeper with mittens at night so she doesn't scratch at night, but we don't want to do that during the day because of developmental reasons. The girl is FAST and can get those little fingers into her hair in less than a second; one day, she managed to scratch herself on the scalp enough to make it bleed! That day, socks on the hands WERE the solution. Urgh ... she's a mess ... but oh, so cute. :)

Separation Anxiety

2008-06-26T21:51:00.000-05:00

Well, I did it! I survived a night -- in fact, three! -- away from Claire. Last weekend, Syndee came in town for a Girls' Weekend, and we headed to Southlake Town Square to have a sleepover with Nina on Friday and Saturday night. It was the first night that I wasn't there to put Claire to bed, and I found myself checking the clock thinking about what she might be doing now. It was also the first night in the last 5 months that I had the opportunity to sleep for more than 4 hours at a time straight (because you don't sleep well that last month of pregnancy either) ... and what do I do? Wake up every 4 hours to stare at the clock for a few minutes and find myself unable to sleep past 6. :)

Saturday night was better; not nearly as difficult. But I sure was ready to head home Sunday morning! Seeing her sweet, smiling face when I got home topped off an awesome weekend, and I am so grateful to Syndee, Nina, and Diana for realizing how much I needed to decompress and vent to my best girlfriends.

As for James, I heard that Friday night was pretty rough. It took over 2 hours to get Claire down, and they (he and his parents) finally resorted to the stroller. Saturday, however, was much better.

Then, this week, I had a business trip where I left early Tuesday morning and returned Wednesday night. Even though it was only a one-nighter, it was harder to leave because it was two full days instead of just one, I was out of town instead of just down the street, and I really missed two nights since I didn't get to put her to bed either day.

This morning, I was determined to hang out with her a few minutes before I went to work so I waited for her to wake up. What is it about babies and only sleeping when you don't want them to?! Usually Claire start stirring about 6:30, so at 6:20, I start waiting ... and waiting ... and then decided to get ready while I waited ... and waited .... 7:20 rolls around, and I'm getting antsy. FINALLY at 7:30 she pops her head up, looks around, and blesses me with a big smile.

Totally worth the wait.

Being away has been a good thing, I think, for all of us. James now has the confidence that he can take care of Claire on his own, Claire's more comfortable with Daddy, and Mommy doesn't feel the pressure as much anymore that she always needs to be available. Maybe I can pick up those weekday dinners with Corrie again!

Time Goes By

2008-06-17T12:07:00.001-05:00

This past Sunday -- Father's Day -- marked one year since I found out I was pregnant. Incredibly, it's been a year since our lives irrevocably changed just because there were two pink lines instead of just one.

I still remember how I broke the news. I was a few days late and decided to take a test in the morning. There was this faint, faint second line that I wasn't even sure was really there ... but it was enough to get my hopes up even though I didn't say anything to anyone (my parents happened to be visiting that weekend because I wanted them to see the new house). I waited until that afternoon after everyone was gone to take another test. Yup, there it is, that second line! I wrapped up the two tests in a plastic bag -- because not wrapping them up is just too gross -- and put them in a gift bag along with a card "Pickles and Ice Cream ... Let the cravings begin!" that I left on James' laptop. And waited. And waited. And waited.

About 6 HOURS later, James was working on his laptop, and I eagerly waiting for his reaction. A few MINUTES later I hear "What the hell? WHAT THE HELL?!" (he's not a cusser). He came into the living room in shock, gave me a hug, and mumbled something about needing to go research 529 plans. :D

3 weeks -- and about 10 additional at-home pregnancy tests -- later, we shared the news with our families. I had originally wanted to wait until after my first sonogram at least, but it's so hard to get my side of the family together nowadays that I just had to take advantage of the situation. Plus, morning sickness was starting to kick in full force, and I wanted to let them know why I felt like crap.

The opportunity really presented itself rather nicely, actually. Everyone was sitting around playing the Wii, and Dwo asked me if I was going to get another dog. I said probably not because we'll probably do the kid thing first. Dwo asked, "okay, when do you think that will be?", and I said, "how about next February?". He said okay and kind of walked off ... then it sunk in, eyes got wide, and he was super, super excited. My mom, who was washing the dishes, said something like, "I thought you were going to tell us that last time we were in Dallas, and that was why you wanted us to visit!". Moms. :)

Fast-forward to today. I look at how quickly Claire is growing and learning, and I'm in wonder at how fast time goes by. Each day when I come home from work, I feel like she's bigger, faster, smarter, stronger. At the end of each evening, I look at her just a little longer than necessary to remember the moment because never again will my little girl be this little, this dependent, this vulnerable. Everyone keeps pushing for the next milestone -- the solid foods, the crawling, the talking -- but I want to say "slow down!". I want to enjoy this moment in time just a little bit longer.

I hardly feel like I'm the same person I was just a year ago; I'm so much more. Not only am I a wife, I'm also a mother. I have not one, but two, full-time jobs because you don't stop being a mom just because you're not with your baby. I've learned how to focus on a little sleep and to make quick decisions, usually to stop the crying. I realize that I'm no longer the eternally "nice" person anymore, but I haven't figured out what my new label might be. My relationship with James has morphed and grown into something different ... but deeper. Although it's never going to be over between James and I (a running joke he'd understand), if anything were to ever happen, our lives are now eternally entwined to where we would never truly go separate ways. I no longer live just for myself but also for another little person. Being a mom is both the most rewarding and most difficult job I've ever had.

And it's all worth it. I'm exactly where I want to be.

Why Can't I Sleep?!

2008-06-06T21:20:00.000-05:00

Seriously. How is it that both my baby and my husband can sleep ... well, like babies? James, who happened to do a roll for work at midnight last night for about 15 minutes, was exhausted today and passed out at 8 when Claire did. Yet I, who has averaged maybe 6 hours of (non-contiguous) sleep at night for 4 months now, am unable to join them in slumber. I was never even able to "sleep when the baby sleeps"! It's a skill, I think ... one that I have yet to master.

The Deed's Been Done

2008-06-06T20:09:00.000-05:00

Well, today's the day. Claire is 4-months old today, and we gave her formula for the first time. At her well-baby visit, I told Dr. Frank that I'm not sure I'm going to be able to keep with her needs, so he green-lit both solid foods and supplementing with formula ... and gave us a ton of formula samples, of course. It would be great if I never actually had to buy any of it myself! :)

Funny thing is, I actually pumped enough yesterday and today that there wasn't a need to go to the powdered stuff, but I felt strongly that I want to try it on a weekend so that I can see the results and make sure everything goes okay. So, at her last feeding before bed tonight, we first mixed 2oz of breastmilk with 2oz of formula, then gave her another 2oz of straight formula. She took it all like a champ! I'm both relieved and a little sad. But the most important thing is that Claire is getting the food she needs.

Now, we just watch. Today's a little weird also because she's not feeling great from her shots, plus she didn't eat or sleep much today, but you gotta start some time. If we wait until the perfect time, there just won't be any, so today's as good a day as any!

Feed the Need

2008-05-27T16:43:00.000-05:00

Claire's still taking down bottles like a champ, many of them 4oz at a time. It's quite exciting and fascinating to watch given that she used to complain all the way through just an ounce of milk from a bottle. However, there is a price to pay on my side in that, now that she's fully on medium-sized nipples and being fed as if she's drinking from a beer bong, she doesn't exactly want to work for her food ... meaning she doesn't always have patience to feed from the boob. Instead of needing to pump enough to get her through the day while I'm at work, I now have to pump enough to also get through her feedings until she goes to sleep ... and, in the case of this morning, one for her dawn feeding as well. That's a lotta milk!

I'm angry with myself that the weekend she increased her feedings was also the weekend that I decided to act the martyr and pump during the day instead of feeding on need. I did a great job pumping my normal amount, but it's not enough to satiate the new milk monster that has emerged. What if I could have provided if I had just breastfed her and poo-pooed what other people were requesting?

Breastfeeding is such an emotional thing for me. I love it. For one thing, it's the one thing that I can do for my baby that no one else can provide; it makes me special. Plus, there's this incredible bonding when she's feeding where I can just watch her and I feel so at peace. Not to mention that it makes me feel like a hero ... able to give life! It's an extension of the feelings I had when I was pregnant and carrying this little baby around in my body keeping her safe. And I'm not ready for it to be over!

My biggest fear right now is that I'm not able to pump enough for her to feed throughout the day and that I won't make it to 6 months. Logically, I know that supplementing with formula isn't a bad thing and that any breastmilk is better than none, but I can't help but feel like I'm letting her down if I give up.

Why does it seem like I'm always writing about breast feeding?

Here We Go Again!

2008-05-18T22:14:00.000-05:00

I think Claire has hit her 3-month growth spurt. Last week, she started wanted to nurse a lot more often (thus increasing my milk supply) so I knew something was up. This week, she has started eating much larger bottles (more than 4 ounces) and is having these crazy outbursts where she goes from happy to VERY, VERY unhappy for no reason. I'm hoping that this growth spurt plumps her up again and doesn't stretch her out too much because she's starting to lose her cheeks! What makes it even more interesting this time is that she's found her voice, which means that the crying is much louder than the last time we went through this.

This, too, shall pass. :)

Sleeping-wise, we've started a true bedtime ritual (bath, book, boob), and she's doing a great job going to sleep between 8 and 9 and waking up between 6 and 7. The nighttime feedings have been variable, but I think it's part of the growth spurt. With her eating more now, I'm guessing that she'll tank up during the day and wake less at night to feed. We shall see!

Happy Mother's Day!

2008-05-11T17:57:00.000-05:00

My first Mother's Day! After getting my and James' mom better gifts this year now that I realize how much they did (and are still doing) for us, the next thing on my list of to-dos on my first Mother's Day is to apologize to all of the other mothers out there and pretty much say "I take it back!" Not Claire, of course, but all of the judgements and supposed decisions that I made before I had a child. I can honestly say, you can't really imagine what it's like until it happens to you. I take back thinking I would never want sleep in the same bed as my baby. I take back believing I'd never use a pacifier as a mute button. I take back planning on letting her cry it out at 3 months of age. I take it all back! With all my plans shot, you'd think I'd be disappointed, but I'm not ... and it's so, so, so much better than I ever could have imagined.

My mom shared these quotes with me today, and they definitely resonate with what I'm feeling:

It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
-- Erma Bombeck (1927-1996), American newspaper columnist and author.

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. You are connected to your child.... A mother always has to think twice: once of herself and once for her child.
-- Sophia Loren (1934- ), Italian motion-picture actor.

I also got this poem from Renee's blog and think it captures a lot of what I've discovered just in the last three months.

Before I was a Mom
I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late I got into bed.
I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.

Before I was a Mom
I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on. Spit on.
Chewed on
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night..

Before I was a Mom
I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.

Thank you, moms, for everything you do.

I did it, and I survived!

2008-04-29T21:49:00.001-05:00

I did it ... after 2 months, 3 weeks, and 2 days, I spent an entire day away from Claire. I pretty much knocked my old record of 5 hours out of the water by being out of the house for almost 11 hours today sans baby!

James' parents will be Claire's primary caregivers the next 12 weeks before she goes to daycare (relieved by my parents for a week every 4-5 weeks), so they came in yesterday for today's "trial run" to make sure all parties involved felt comfortable with the arrangement.

Claire fed at about 6:15 this morning, and then I passed her on to James so that I could get ready for "work". James passed her to his parents about 6:30 since they were already up, and they were off! I left the house at 7am and filled my day with spa treatments (thanks, James!), furniture shopping, and a few small errands. I also managed to pump in my car and at the spa around the times that I hope to keep at the office which was good, as was the fact that I was able to pump effectively (whew!).

I have to admit, it was kind of nice being able to use two hands to do stuff and not have to tune one ear to listen for a crying baby, but it sure was nice to come home and see her smiling face. Since her grandparents already took her for two walks today and gave her a bath, I just held her, hugged her, and snuggled up with her to make up for the hours away. Now I totally understand why working moms often have their babies sleep with them, and I sincerely apologize to you all for any judgement I may have made in the past!

Being away from her was so hard, but I can say that I did it ... and I'll be able to do it again. Yay, me!

1 more day before I go back ...